Saturday, February 19, 2011

Truth Behind Why Men Cheat On Their Wives!

So why do men cheat on their wives? There are many answers to this question and a lot of times, it's not exactly what women would like to hear, such as men are biologically wired to seek out as many suitable partners as possible or because they're not getting as much action at home or it's due to the reason that his wife refuses to try new things, there could be many reasons along these lines.

These arguments might be true in some circumstances but not all the time. What we're going to do is to look a little deeper into the whole relationship dynamics of a typical marriage to analyze what might have went wrong.

Everyone has their own image of an ideal relationship with their partner and what it would look and feel like. However, the reality is that at certain times you may feel that you've given your partner all that you can give, yet you wonder what more could you give to prevent them from cheating.

To get a better understanding of this, let's look at the 80/20 ratio and how it relates to marriage expectations and commitments. The rule states that many times you may have felt that you're giving 100% to the relationship, but this might only account for 80% of the ideal relationship that your partner had in mind. That means 20% of what you're doing might not be aligned with his picture of a perfect marriage where all his needs are satisfied.

Of course, this is not your fault as there is hardly a marriage where both partners can fully satisfy each others every need at 100%. Thus, a lot of room is needed for compromise. You may also consider whether your husband can provide for 100% of your own needs.

This is not to say that, since you can't provide that extra 20% that his more inclined to find someone else who can. Generally men are quite happy and satisfied with being with a wife who could provide for 80% of all his needs, and he may have no motivation to seek out someone else who could only provide that extra 20%.

The only time, which a man might be tempted to seek that missing 20% is when the situation and opportunity presented itself for him to experience what it's like. And so he will feel that someone you could not offer him that 20% which he's missing, therefore, he'd be more inclined to see in other women.

This 80/20 ratio is not something that's scientific it's simply a tool to illustrate the point that marriages is an agreement for an exchange in needs and value between two people, whereby each person fulfills certain needs of the other.

A truly lasting marriage will involve each person aspiring to work towards providing and fulfilling every aspect of their partners needs until that 20% is fully accounted for. Many cheaters would come to discover too late that instead of seeking out another person, they could have worked on that 20% that they felt was missing with their spouse.

That's why many people who've committed an affair, would've regret their rash decisions and realized that they've risked losing that 80% of fulfillment that their partner can provide for a measly 20% from someone else. For those who feel neglecting in the area of perhaps, excitement or fun from something new, and searched to fulfill that need by cheating, that "fun" really isn't all the cracked up to be, when they realized the rift in the relationship that they've caused.

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