Using Alcohol Or Taking Drugs Will Not Take Away Your Worries

At some point in time, you feel lost and confused. No matter what you do, your worries and fears are bothering you. In these particular cases, some people may turn to alcohol or other substances to manage their worries and stresses.

Using alcohol or taking drugs will not take away all of your problems. You might feel better now, but down the road you will feel worse.

So what do you do to manage your fears and worries? The key is in how you manage your stresses and worries. Here are some ways in how to manage your fears and anxieties.

Get some help. Discussing your problems with a counselor can go a long way in overcoming your fears and anxieties. By getting some help, you will learn better ways to deal with your problems. In the long run, you will be successful in dealing with your future problems if you get professional help.

Do not try to get rid of all of your worries at the same time. Determine which of your worries bothers you the most and try to tackle that one first. When you are able to manage this particular worry then go on to the next one. Do not put everything on your plate at the same time. Take it one step at a time.

Do not try to determine what may or may not happen later on. Just focus on the present and do not look too far ahead. Take care of your current problems and do not focus down the road. Use your energy to deal with your curent problems.

Begin to learn what works in managing your worries. For instance, you have a lot of anxiety and you decide to read a book to feel better. The next time you feel anxious you can read another book because reading made you feel better the last time.

Challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your lonely or depressed, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. For example, some people may think that if they are alone at the present time then they will always be alone. This is not true. Even if your alone today does not mean that you will be alone all the time. No one can predict the future with one hundred percent accuracy.

Remember that using alcohol or other substances will only make things worse for you. Instead of using these things, get some help and practice using constructive techniques in managing your fears. It will take some hard work and lot of patience. The key is to be persistent and be committed in trying to solve your problem.

Stan Popovich is the author of, A Layman's Guide to Managing Fear, an easy to read book that presents a overview of techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and anxieties. For additional information go to: www.managingfear.com

How to attract women

Why there are so many guys get failed when they try to woo with the girls or even ask them for a date? What are the secrets of attracting women? If you know how to attract women then thats gonna be simple. You likewise absolutely can have women flocking over you. But remember there are lot of things requires you to attract women successfully. First thing is your personal hygiene. The absolute majority of girls are turned off by malodorous or smelly men. Listening avidly is also one of the major role of getting their attention. I believe that if you know the basic or strategies on how to attract women then you'll realize its a cinch.

Here are the strategies or my suggestions for you when you want the girls flocking around you.

Your sense of humor plays a vital component on how to attract them.. Girls preferred a man with a good sense of humor than anything else. Lucky would you be if you also have money and good looks, but above all things they choose a person with a sense of humor because girls hate boring dates or partners.

You must always Flatter them. Girls loved to be praises all the time, it seems you are easy to appreciate even simple things. Try to give compliments on what you see new things on her self. Like her hair, outfit, and other bling-blangs.

You must be sometimes look mysterious with their eyes. Because its a challenge for them to know you more if they think you look something inexplicable at first.

Your sense of listening is also one of the most important subfigure of how to attract them. When they speaks, listen them truly and avidly. Girls turn on once you follow this. They couldnt refuse a guy who will really listen and showing interest with them.

You dont show powerless, girls are looking for a strong man. If you look wussy then start to change your character then. They dont like mama's boy.

Try to be a little bit naughty, girls love a suggestion of naughtiness but beware of it not so rude at all. It doesnt condone poor behavior its a simple trick.

You try to Occupy her mind., its a simple trick that you let her believed you . They dont want to think that a guy is just after her body. Especially when its like undressing her with your eyes. Try to keep your eyes off in their curves. Just let her think you are interested with her encephalon.

And your personal hygiene plays a crucial facts here. When you really wanted a girl stays longer with you then you keep and maintan your personal hygiene. Such as cleaned teeth, trimmed nails, and use a good deodorant that could last for your hygiene. They easily turned off once they smelled different with you.

I hope this could help you on how to attract women. Girls dont have any reason of resisting for your date.

Think Positive! Set a Present Moment Agenda with Five Spiritual Steps

The past is important because we learn from it. The past helps us navigate through our current choices in order to evolve our soul. We’re in soul school from the minute we hit the ground until we cross over; it’s coursework made possible by the enriching and sometimes challenging conditions we have chosen. We chart a learning program well before we get here, which includes our parents, our gender, and circumstances that will provide us with the greatest opportunity for personal and spiritual growth.


Where we get into trouble is giving up our freedom to make new choices based upon the present. Every day is new, no matter how you slice it. The sun comes up in spite of our mistakes or the despair we must face. But we are meant to continually move forward. Getting stuck in the past holds us behind, as prisoners within an incredible universe of opportunity. True empowerment stems from living now, not reacting to now from a mindset of the past or living with worry about what might happen tomorrow, next month, or next year. What can we do every day, no matter what has happened to in the past, to begin painting a positive life on a fresh, new canvas?


Classify the Past

The past is a collection of our emotions, experiences, and thought patterns as a result of living life. As adults, when we feel an emotion, it’s often based upon past experience. Life events trigger our emotional collection, and we interpret our current experiences through this lens. The problem is the value we take away from the past. When we allow only the good to shine through, we are able to live in the present. When we worry about the future, or agonize over the past, we are not fully engaged in life. The trick is to stay focused on your capabilities to address the present. View your past as a wonderful, robust course in life and stop agonizing over your mistakes or what someone said.


Examine Emotional Carryover

Changing a negative outlook takes a bit of discipline because you have to deeply resonate with the idea of what you want in the present moment, and accept it as already happening. When you attune to an idea, goal, or state of mind, you want to attract it now, not in the future. It takes a lot of self-reflection.

Do some simple mental housecleaning to discover if what you are feeling now is being embroidered upon by the past. If you’re discouraged, shift your thinking to the “today” setting and stop dredging up all sorts of feelings from the last twenty years – about your parents, jobs that no longer matter, or even people who let you down. Release those people and circumstances and be free. If you carry so much heaviness, you’ll never get out from under water. The past is over. Do yourself a favor and lighten your load – buoyancy guaranteed!


Be Inspired by Everyone

Life has many meanings but often we’ve got the definition backwards. As an exchange with others, life isn’t all about taking it in. It’s mostly about what you give out. This I know to be true, based upon my observations of many people who are critically ill yet have fantastic attitudes about sharing themselves with others.

If you visit a pediatric cancer ward, you will see children who are physically challenged beyond words but are still an inspiration to everyone around them. Despite their prognosis, their light shines bright with hope because they are living one day at a time. They seem illuminated and, thankfully, keep the rest of us going. Quite frankly, they are among the most inspirational people we have on earth, because they make everyone stop and think, “If life can be good despite those circumstances, then why am I holding myself back?” I believe part of their purpose is to give the rest of us a wake-up call to change our outlook. And if we find ourselves in the same boat, we too can keep everyone else going strong while we test our own abilities to stay in the present moment.


Release Fear and Self-Doubt

I think we are often fearful of believing we can have anything we want. When we look at the world, we see so much lack, unhappiness, war, starvation, pain, struggle, limitation. We begin to believe in it, and then we give those ideas power. With the number of people we see every day immersed in those conditions, it seems nearly impossible to trust that the normal human experience can be one of abundance, joy, peace, fulfillment, health, and ease. We’ve been told since childhood that “nothing’s perfect.” Nothing is worse than this type of programming, because we’re never going to realize our full human potential until we release our former ideas of what is possible. Life is a beautiful, perfect, glorious miracle. We choose our situations, our families, our painful experiences in order to evolve.


As we observe the full range of everything from despair to triumph, we see the huge opportunity that exists to make change. Despair challenges our perception of what can be. With fear and self-doubt in our toolkit, our capability to produce change is diminished. In the big picture, life is perfect because it is giving us room to grow. A little bad weather makes us sturdier. We need the rain, and even a cold winter solidifies us, making us more receptive to spring. But, sure as anything, we are going to grow despite our circumstances. There should be no fear of growth. We should be proud of surviving, overcoming, beating the odds, not living in fear of more to come, and especially proud of not dragging ourselves down, together with those around us, with emotions like fear and self-doubt that do nothing but keep us in the dark.

Consciously Create Your Day

Over the years, I have experimented with ways to release the past and move forward, living life in the present moment. I’ve noticed that when I start my day without any clear direction of how I choose to think, I don’t get the results I want. I used to spend years regurgitating old problems. Without establishing my expectations of the universe as to how I desired my day to unfold, I discovered I would replay those same issues over and over again. So I began to make a supreme effort to move disappointments, loss, and feelings of non-success farther from my mind each day.

Now, before I get up in the morning, I lie in bed for a few minutes and create my day by using a series of affirmative statements that are designed to do three things: they are positive, present-moment statements about what is, not what will be; they address some element of my life that needs improvement; and they get me to completely identify with the power within to manifest my circumstances. To manifest means to bring into our immediate experience, and make that which is created by the mind into a tangible or observable reality. The power is derived from spirit, or the Divine, which pervades every inch of the universe. To achieve this goal, I say my affirmative statements with love, grateful to be alive and to have my chosen learning opportunities. Then I focus on being open to positive change.

I also visualize life being unfolded to me in creative ways and ask the universe to show me its perfection in ways I would not expect. I make a point of saying this because I think we can better understand the co-creative relationship we have with spirit when we release overly specific intentions and let the power of our own thoughts return to us in ways that give us feedback on our desires. When mentally creating my day in the morning, I’ve had new people walk off the street and become my employees because I saw a need in our organization. Abundance has arrived in the form of revenue streams I did not expect. When I see myself as a co-creator of the universe each day, I’ve attracted great results.

Remember, when you release the past, consciously create your day, and have the mental discipline to think positive, you’ll see results. Through constant awareness (aligning with powerful and positive ideas) you’ll begin to see a difference. A big part of conscious awareness and living in the present moment is about being open to the feedback the environment is providing. Be open to positive change and deeply love life. Be perceptive and positive!


© The Goddess Network, Inc. and Charlene M. Proctor, Ph.D. 2007. All Rights Reserved. See http://www.thegoddessnetwork.com/connect.php?page=eshow for more empowering thoughts! Register for The E-Show, a series of enlightening lectures!

Want to learn more? Charlene is the Positive Thinking Expert for SelfGrowth.com and packs a powerful, practical punch in all her articles! Visit her at SelfGrowth.com for great advice on how to remain positive in today’s world! Her books are available for purchase at major retailers, at www.thegoddessnetwork.net, www.amazon.com and www.bn.com.


For a more complete definition on positive thinking, see The Evolution of Positive Thinking: Views from Science, Spirituality, Psychology and Hollywood by Charlene M. Proctor, Ph.D.

Dr. Charlene M. Proctor is the founder of The Goddess Network, Inc. an on-line educational resource for topics on spirituality, relationships, and women's studies. Author of Let Your Goddess Grow! She is a researcher and educator in the field of women's empowerment and develops self-empowerment strategies for women in all walks of life. She is a subject matter expert for Beliefnet.com, the world's largest self-help and personal growth website. She currently facilitates the PATH to Empowerment program for Lighthouse Path in Michigan, a residential women's shelter for homeless mothers, teaching them how to cope with life and increase self-esteem and confidence. To learn more, visit http://www.thegoddessnetwork.net

How Love Grows (Practical Steps To Keeping Love Alive In Your Relationships)

We are meant to live a life of love. However, no matter how successful some are in other aspects of their lives, they don’t feel it’s possible to have the same success in love. They tell themselves to “be realistic.” Being realistic about relationships” is considered natural as we “grow up” and give up the fantasies, foolishness and dreams of childhood. But being in love is the most mature and realistic thing you can do. It energizes your life, fills you with positivity, creates generosity and makes every moment beautiful. The body heals the heart is happy. The real question is, how can we learn to help love grow in all aspects of our lives? What gets in the way?

The following steppingstones will show how to help love grow, whatever our situation. They include exercises to strengthen our love muscles, and turn our lives around.

The One Right Besides You

Most of the time we are either searching for the right person or wanting to change the one we are with. We do not take a precious moment to stop and truly see the one who is right in front of our eyes. And, beyond that, though we may not be aware of it, we do many things to push that person away.

Look at a person who is close to you right now – anyone it happens to be. Notice what you are demanding of them in order to be happy together. Then notice the subtle ways in which you push them away.

For a moment, stop it. Spend time just being together. Allow things to go whatever way they do. Let all of it be fine just as it is.

Tomorrow, do the same thing with someone else. The more we can be “right” and happy with each person we meet, the fuller and more joyous our lives will be.

Playing At The Game of Love

So many complain that they are not loved. The reason for this can be quite

simple. They are so busy playing roles and games that the partner never gets to know who they really are. They never know either.

Notice what roles (or games) you play in relationships, and what roles you

demand others play.. See if you are in love with the person you are with, or with the role he/she is playing right now.

Turn this around for a little while. Stop playing roles completely. Love is not a game we play. Love is knowing and accepting yourself and the other exactly as they are. Who we are is always loveable and beautiful. It’s the roles that get in the way.

Letting Him Come and Letting Him Go

One great obstacle in living a life of love is the tendency to hold on. We grasp

and cling to those we care for, preventing their freedom and ease. But this is not love, it is attachment and dependency. In the long run it suffocates the one you cling to and suffocates you too.

Try giving it up for awhile. Let the person come and go as they feel. See how wonderful both of you will feel when you grant your partner this kind of trust. It is said that we can never lose that which belongs to us.

It’s important to put this into action. When someone comes into your life (or

day) practice letting him come. Welcome the person – whoever he is. Enjoy what it is he brings.When it is time for a person to go away, practice letting him go. Do not turn the

person’s leaving into an experience of rejection, loss or abandonment. Realize that his leaving has nothing to do with you. It is simply time for him to go.

Do this with yourself as well. Let yourself come and go freely in life, not tying

yourself in unnecessary chains. The more we free others and ourselves, the more love can grow.

Letting Go Of Unnecessary Expectations

Many feel that love is not possible unless all their demands are met. They can be

quite amazed to discover that even when these demands are met, nothing really changes. These demands don’t lead to happiness. They just may be obstacles to love.

Take a look at what you feel is absolutely necessary in relationships. Realize this

Expectations may be keeping all kinds of people and possibilities away. Not only that, these expectations can be making you fearful and rigid, not open to what is available.

Let one of these demands subside. At first let it go for just one day and see how

it feels. (Remember you can always take it back again). Now try another the next day. As we do this many times, we may find that that which we thought was crucial was only getting in the way. The more we do this the lighter we will feel and all kinds of new people will start appearing in our lives. We have made room.

Giving Gifts

Giving and receiving are the fuel that keeps love burning strong. What gifts do you give in relationships? Take a few moments and also see what you hope to receive in return. Just giving for its own sake, without hoping for anything in return is the most powerful giving of all.

It’s important to practice this. Give something to someone each day. Then, find something new you can give and offer that. Now, do this with different kinds of people, those you might not have given to before.

It’s also important to do this with yourself as well. Each day take a moment to find out what kind of gift you would like. (Can be simple – a walk in the park, new lipstick, time with someone you care for.) Although this exercise is simple, it is extremely powerful. Doing this daily can turn everything around. When we give freely and fully, we do not feel so needful. Less demands are placed on our relationships and we feel full and complete.

Becoming Your Own Best Friend

Many say they are lonely, even with a partner at their side. This is simply because

they have not yet made friends with themselves. Once they make friends with themselves and are able to be who they are, it is difficult to feel lonely again.

Make friends with yourself. Spend time noticing who you are and accept

whatever you notice, all parts of yourself. Stop judging and rejecting what is going on. Just notice and let it be. Understand that underneath the clamor, you are perfect just as you are.

When you learn to accept and make friends with yourself you can then become a

true friend to others, and also choose to be in relationships with those who value and appreciate you. As your love for yourself and others keep growing, the very meaning of relationships alters and life takes a whole new turn.

Cc/author/2007

Everybody “Wants” – But How Many Really Have The Motivation To Get It?

Every action you take, no matter how big or how small, defines everything that you achieve in life. And, with every action there is a motive - something that puts a person in motion.

But, what is the real definition of MOTIVATION?

Is motivation an incentive, such as a monetary reward or a gift? For example, when you were younger your father or mother might have told you that, “For every “A” you get in school next semester, I’ll give you a specified amount of money”. I’ll bet that it probably worked. You achieved a few “A’s”, took the cash and then achieved less than stellar grades the following semester when the incentive was not offered again.

Or is motivation a threat? For example, your doctor may have told you recently, “If you don’t lose weight, exercise regularly and eat right, your cholesterol level will continue to be through the roof! So, for a few months, you do what the doctor says. You go back for a follow up. Your health is better. And to celebrate, you head off to the nearest fast-food restaurant for a greasy burger, greasier fries and sugary drink. Again, the effect is temporary.

Motivation is not about external incentives, rewards, inducements or threats. My definition of motivation is “an emotion or desire that operates on the “will to do” and causes it to take action”. To be long lasting, motivation MUST come from inside you. Seneca said, “Most powerful is he that has himself in his own power”. The “will to do” is the greatest power in the world tied to human accomplishment. And no one can predict its limits.

Where does the “will to do” come from? Unlike the products in so many advertisements, television infomercials and “spammy” e-mails, it does not come in a handy pill to instantaneously transform you from a “dud” to a “stud”.

So how does one develop a high level of motivation that serves them day in and day out? In my Success System, The Power Of Concentration – How To Take Control Of Your Life, I cover a number of success strategies to develop your “will to do”. I’ll briefly cover two of them here.

My Motivation Strategy #1: There Needs To Be A Desire To Change Within You…

Every one of us possesses some level of "will to do”. It is the inner energy which controls all conscious and subconscious acts. Your “will to do” directs your life forces, habits (both good and bad) and your condition in life. Your will has a connection with all avenues of knowledge, activities, and accomplishment. When you develop the power of concentration within you, you will have developed a higher level of self mastery and your “will to do”.

The “will to do” is a force that is strictly practical. We know it is a force through its cause-and-effect nature. It is a power, like electricity, we can direct. To the extent we direct it, we determine our future. Every time you accomplish any definite act, consciously or subconsciously, you use the principle of the will. Through the “will to do” you can do anything. Therefore the way you use your will - both right and wrong – will make a huge difference in the outcome of your life focus.

You probably know of cases where people have shown tremendous strength under some traumatic experience: The frail person who lifts a heavy car to save the person trapped underneath. The fireman, who rushes into a burning building in order to save others, is another example. In both examples, they used their "will to do" to accomplish the task.

The “will to do” can accomplish great results through activities that grow out of great concentration. In developing the power of concentration, we acquire the power of voluntary attention to such an extent that we can direct it where we want to and hold it steadily to its task, until we accomplish our goals. When you learn to use your will power it becomes a mighty force. Almost everything can be accomplished through its proper use. It is greater than physical force because it can be used to control not only your physical actions, but also your mental health and mind power.

Here’s My Motivation Strategy #2: Develop “Clearly-Defined Goals”…

Many human-performance experts, including yours truly, believe the #1 reason why most people will never get what they want is they - roll of the drum, please! - really don’t know what they want. A few years ago, a study by the Ford Foundation revealed that 90% of people have no idea or plans for getting what they want in life! Imagine how motivated you will be if you start every day with clearly-defined goals and the emotion and desire for achievement in all areas of your life.

For example, what if you took time to visualize your exciting and very specific career and financial objectives? Then, you created objectives for the personal and professional relationships in your life. And, when you were done, you took the time to write down these thoughts in a written action plan with on-going self improvement and self-development milestones. Can you see how this would give you more excitement and motivation everyday? Don't you agree that clarity about your direction in life is a powerful motivator?

Einstein said, “An object in motion tends to stay in motion”. I challenge you to become an “object in perpetual motion” by beginning to use these two strategies. For additional motivation strategies and effective exercises to develop your “will to do”, please visit our website and see our Success Systems.

Keith A. Shaw, President of www.MindBodySpiritCentral.com, is an authority on motivation, self improvement, success, health and wellness. Keith is the author and creator of "The Power Of Thought", "The Power Of Serenity And Peace" and "The Power Of Concentration" Success Systems that have helped people achieve more than they ever dreamed possible. He also created "The Power Of Qigong" DVDs and books for improving health, wellness, energy, mind power and more.

Keith has also written articles that have been published in publications such as Modern Sage, Of Spirit, Self Growth and others.

Important “Before You Join” Tips, for Home Business Seekers: How to

Often time, people think that any product or service will do, they get excited about the pay plan and think that the rest will just fall into place.

I know this because that is how is used to approach business. I would throw money at whatever 'opportunity' was the flavor of the month. Give me something to sell, so I can make some money, was the attitude I had.

I spent tons of energy, time and money using this approach, selling everything from phone cards, to diet supplement. Finally after a bit of growing up, I started to see the cycles that I was going through. Literally, every six months I was starting a new business with the same feelings of excitement and anticipation as the last one, six months earlier.

I decide to figure out WHY. Why I was failing and what I could do to change it.

One of the best decisions I ever made was when I decided that another business opportunity was not going to make the difference. The changing had to come from me, from the inside. I spent my next six month cycle working on myself, reading, thinking, growing, when I was ready to move on I took a totally different approach to my next business venture.

I decide to join Wealth Masters International after much research. Rather than diving in head first, hoping it worked out, I took what I would now call a more professional approach.

Strategies for BEFORE you commit to your next business

1. Get yourself to a position where you like who you are. You will find that when you are comfortable in your own skin, you will attract a business that is comfortable with you.

2. Try the product or service first. Buy the product or service, take it home, use it and genuinely decide if it offers high value to you, the end user. This will allow you to genuinely share your enthusiasm and believe in your business.

3. Choose something that is a natural interest to you. People really buy you, not what you are selling. If you're a health nut, get into that industry, if it's finances, find something in that area. Avoid trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.

4. Be natural, be yourself. Avoid forcing yourself to get into something, do it because you want to, not because you have to.

Bill Suecroft sells financial education and advice on home businesses, from his home office. To contact Bill visit his website at http://www.mydesiretoachieve.com/

The Secret to a Long, Healthy Life

A fascinating ritual occurs when someone turns 100. A newspaper sends a reporter to ask the centenarian, “What is your secret to a long life and good health?” The irony is that they don’t know.

Often they make something up, e.g., broccoli, red wine, or prunes. When Diane Sawyer on ABC News asked 98-year-old Beatrice Wood how she managed to live so long, she replied, “Chocolate and young men.” George Burns quipped it was junk food, saying “at my age I need all the preservatives I can get.”

When we look at vital centenarians as a group, however, their anti-aging secrets become obvious. Physically they have little in common. Most don’t smoke and they typically maintain a fairly constant weight throughout their lives. They are physically active people (a lifestyle choice). As actress Helen Hayes put it, “If you rest, you rust.” That’s about all the vital centenarians have in common physically.

Their single biggest secret is that they all have a strong sense of purpose throughout their lives. That was easier for most of them then for us. They grew up in a time when people often worked for the same employer or even at the same job for their whole career. Marriage was till death do us part. Religion provided a strong sense of identity.

Today we have so many choices. We often reinvent our careers and move to other cities to pursue education or jobs. Half of our marriages end in divorce.

Anti-aging psychology finds that when we don’t have a strong sense of purpose, we become vulnerable to depression, despair, and physical illnesses. We lose our spark and vitality and argue with our alarm clocks about getting up in the morning. If at any time in your life you don’t have a strong sense of purpose, finding one needs to be a very high priority.

As Robert Byrne put it, “The purpose of life is a life of purpose.” We all seek happiness. As Helen Keller put it, “Many people have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.”

There are some other key mental health traits that distinguish vital centenarians. They are independent and self-reliant people. They view life as too precious to fret about what others think. When they go to a doctor, they decide for themselves whether the doctor’s advice makes sense. When a reporter asked a 104 year old woman what was the best thing about being 104, she replied, “No peer pressure.”

They are optimists and have a positive outlook on life. They foster fond memories and let bad memories wither. Consequently, as researcher Belle Boone Beard found, they have twice as many fond memories as negative memories. They let go of resentments. They also have a good sense of humor.

Another key skill is dealing with change. When actress Helen Hayes was asked the best age of her life, she said, “Whatever age I am is the best age.” and she added and “The age we live in is the best age.” Those who view change as threatening and unsettling experience more stress. The key is to embrace change as an exciting ride and to see our times as offering unprecedented opportunity and choice.

Finally, vital centenarians have good coping skills for dealing with change and with loss. If you are going to live a long time, you are going to see a lot of friends and family die. If each death is a devastating tragedy, you will become especially vulnerable to depression and illness. There are many perspectives that help in coping with death including religious beliefs, seeing death as part of life, and perceiving the deceased loved one as a helpful ongoing presence.

What is especially encouraging about these traits is they are all learnable and they are all choices.

If you are ever tempted to say “I’m too old to learn something new,” just think of George Dawson.

Mr. Dawson was an African-American who dropped out of elementary school to help on the farm. When he was 98 years old he decided he was “tired of writing my name with an X” and went to adult education classes and learned to read. His IQ was probably a little below average. At 102 he co-wrote his autobiography, Life is So Good.

If he can learn to read at 98, you certainly aren’t too old to learn something new.

Dr. Michael Brickey, The Anti-Aging Psychologist, teaches people to think, feel, look and be more youthful. He is an inspiring keynote speaker and Oprah-featured author. His works include: Defy Aging, 52 Baby Steps to grow young, and Reverse Aging (anti-aging hypnosis CDs). Visit www.NotAging.com for a free report on anti-aging secrets and a free newsletter with practical anti-aging tips.

Enlightenment Technology

Human spiritual enlightenment occurs when your consciousness permanently expands beyond the limits of your body and your mind’s self-created identity. The energetic membranes between the subconscious, conscious and superconscious levels of the mind dissolve. As an enlightened human, you take 100% responsibility for co-creating your personal experience of reality. And you have zero judgment about what others are co-creating.

Your True Self, a.k.a. Spirit, is pure consciousness and has no form, no body at all. It is an individualized aspect of the Source of All Consciousness; a.k.a. Source, Oneness or God. The only difference between your True Self consciousness and Source consciousness is an energetic membrane that holds the memories of your individualized experiences as you travel through the cosmos, exploring creation.

The difference between your True Self consciousness and your Earth consciousness is another energetic membrane, often referred to as the Illusion of Separation. It separates your memories of this particular Earth incarnation from all other experiences of your True Self.

Enlightenment, a.k.a. Ascension, is not some religious concept reserved only for a chosen few. It is a highly scientific process of energy mechanics, representing the path of order through which consciousness evolves in a multidimensional system.

Frequency measures how fast energy moves. Everything in form has a particular frequency which is always rising – ascending – enlightening – becoming lighter, less dense. It is a natural evolutionary process.

Yet something special has happened recently. Mother Earth took a quantum leap through the evolutionary spiral, accelerating her natural evolutionary process, shortcutting thousand of years. Earth is now hosting multi-dimensional realities. The 3^rd dimension is dissolving and 5^th and higher dimensional realities are coming on-line.

Various enlightenment technologies are now available to help humans align with Mother Earth’s accelerated planetary ascension.

Did you know that:

• Your body is an organic computer?

• Your DNA is the database?

• Your mind is an artificial intelligence software program?

• Your brain is a holographic projector?

• Your Spirit manages your energy from Source.

• Your whole system can be upgraded for ascension to the Divine Human level?

Your Body is an Organic Computer

Think of your mind/body system as a virtual reality game suit your True Self agrees to wear to experience life on this planet. Contained within your DNA is the blueprint for your game suit. Genetic scientists have identified two strands of DNA and mapped 3% of the genetic material needed to create the human body suit. They are puzzled by the other 97% of genetic material that seems not to be organized or active.

Your DNA is the Database

Hidden within the extra DNA is a blueprint for a new type of human body that will eventually be able to navigate in 12^th dimensional realities. There are some human incarnates who serve as enlightenment/ascension facilitators and can activate and transmit the 12-D blueprint, just like computers can transmit files from one to another. Once the blueprint is activated, the genetic material that currently appears inactive begins to organize and reassemble until the body expresses the 12-D structure.

The term Divine Human refers to the enlightened or ascended human who transcends their 3^rd dimensional identity, expresses their True Self identity while their body transforms to express the 12-D blueprint.

Your Mind is an Artificial Intelligence Software Program

Your True Self consciousness knows everything and has access to all information. But your mind has to learn from experience. Your mind is really a very sophisticated artificial intelligence software program.

Your ego is your self-identity sub-program, running within your mind/body computer. It constructed your identity in your first seven years by looking for patterns in your Earthly experience. When it recognized a pattern, a meaning was assigned. The pattern and its meaning became a “rule” in computer terms – you call it a belief.

This rule was added to your programming. At around seven years of age, your self-identify program stopped adding new rules and began gathering evidential data to support the rules it created. At that point, your ego’s job became protecting your mind-created identity.

Your programming was created by you, as a child, with your immature understanding, inadequate and wounded perspective, within the limited environment of your family, school, church and neighborhood. That is why it is so hard to improve your self-image.

Your Brain is a Holographic Projector
Your True Self Manages Your Energy from Source

Imagine a movie projector. The light bulb shines through the film and the projector creates an image on the screen. Your True Self is the light bulb, your programming is the film and your brain is the projector, creating holographic images that you call reality. Everything that is projected on the screen of your reality comes from your programming. The good news is:
YOU CAN UPGRADE YOUR PROGRAMMING.

When you upgrade your programming, you will uninstall your separation, lack, limitation and fear programming. You will replace your mind-created identity with your Divine Human (True Self) Identity. In the absence of fear, you become a strong pillar of inner peace. You will make better choices. You will suddenly see opportunities and open to prosperity that your mind filtered out before. You are free to discover and express your True Self’s purpose for incarnating into this reality (a.k.a. soul’s purpose).

Enlightenment Technology

Consider past models for activating enlightenment or ascension. They called for isolating yourself from normal life and meditating hours a day for decades. They required grueling discipline, life-threatening initiations and giving up all your worldly possessions. New advancements in consciousness technology enable you to receive a series of software/hardware upgrades to your virtual reality game suit.

The technology uses a specific combination of frequencies to open your database and upgrade your programming. Employing focused intention, sacred geometry, high frequency light and sound, the upgrades are delivered in a guided visualization format over 12 sessions. Do you agree that listening to a 1½ hour guided meditation, once a week for 12 weeks, while continuing with the rest of your life is quick and easy by comparison?

Suzanna Kennedy, creator of the enlightenment technology, Divine Human Upgrades™, is an authority on Planetary and Personal Accelerated Evolution. She is a captivating speaker and author of the book Sacred Union, Pathway to Paradise.

Suzanna served for 20 years as a corporate consultant to industry giants; leading large-scale change initiatives. In 1997 she experienced a quantum consciousness awakening, birthing a higher dimensional aspect of her soul into her body. In 1998 she founded Reality Crafting and employs her new multi-dimensional skills to receive and translate technologies from higher dimensions to accelerate planetary and personal evolution. Please feel free to visit her website www.RealityCrafting.com

Freedom and Power of Accountability

Why an article on accountability? While hardly a new topic, the concept is widely maligned, misunderstood, or missed completely. Until we are willing to live our lives from an accountable perspective, there are always excuses as to why we can’t, why our lives don’t work, and why we should not even try.

Let’s start at the beginning. The 3 basic levels of accountability are, briefly:

1) Accountability for our feelings: I do not have choice regarding all the events in my life but I always have choice in how I respond to those events.

2) Accountability for our feelings, choices and lessons: I co-create the experiences in my life. I choose not to waste precious energy blaming myself or anyone else. I honestly examine all of MY choices that co-create the experiences in my life and I choose to learn valuable lessons from everything I experience.

3) Spiritual accountability for everything: This level of accountability is best framed by the statement, “I chose my parents and I will choose the time, place and method of my death.” The implications are many but simply put, we are spiritual beings having a human experience. The experiences we co-create here on earth have some purpose or lesson for us, both at a human and spiritual level. It is our job while we are here to discover that purpose, learn and evolve.

Accountability is a massive concept; however there are some foundational ideas that assist in its integration:

1) Accountability is not “right”, it is simply a way of viewing our lives and experiences that helps us to let go of the past and move forward in life.

2) Accountability is an internal experience; no one can make you accountable

3) Accountability is the foundation of freedom and personal power

In defining accountability it is sometimes easier to start with what accountability is NOT, as our society is very invested in the model of blame. If something is “wrong” then there must be someone to blame; someone or something is responsible. Accountability is NOT SELF BLAME. Too many people believe that being accountable is being responsible and most have the experience of blame attached to being responsible.

The first and most important step in understanding and applying accountability is accepting the concept there is NO BLAME. This idea, while it sounds simple, is really quite radical, and doesn’t fit within belief systems held by most.

If the concept of no blame is difficult for you, simply ask yourself this question, “What if there is no one to blame?” How would that impact your life? How could it assist you and free up your energy? Would this idea support you to forgive yourself and others? Simply releasing the energy of blame can transform your life.

Become conscious of where in your life you blame others and you blame yourself. If possible, let go of the blame and see how it feels.

A concept that allowed me to stop blaming is: We all have made the best possible choices we knew how to make when those choices were made, with the information we had at the time. (Information means our entire development as human beings, mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually).

The truth is, for most people, this is exceptionally difficult to accept. We have been hard wired to blame and there must be someone or something at fault. If we begin to release this idea, we can let go of the emotional energy and weight of blame in our lives. What we are aiming for is the experience of truly accepting what is.

Regardless of how much we feel blame may be justified in a given circumstance, a more important question is, “Is it your wisest choice to consume your precious life energy blaming yourself or others?”

If we choose to blame, we project our life experiences outside of ourselves where we have no power, or internally where we diminish and demean ourselves. From either of these positions we cannot learn or move forward in life. We can only stay stuck.

Next, ask the question, “What is my life lesson in this experience?” Only after answering this question can we really move forward to the power of accountability. The key to ongoing empowerment and personal evolution is interpreting and applying the lessons in our lives.

Practice answering the question “What choices did I make to co-create this experience in my life?” Answer the question in areas of your life where things are going great and areas where things are not terrific. There are significant lessons in both circumstances.

Now the most important aspect of truly being accountable is the application of the lesson(s). Accountability has become a much more commonly used term over the past 15 years. Many people now profess to be accountable and, even more entertaining, to taking accountability. I always wonder, taking it from where? The grounding of taking accountability is usually still related to the weight of responsibility and blame, yet the results in their lives never seem to shift.

Here is the measure of true accountability. Our results in life change because we apply the lessons of our life. It is a simple and powerful measure. If our results do not change, we have not learned the lessons and keep recreating similar experiences over and over again.

If we choose to accept (and apply) the concept of accountability, then no matter the circumstance, we can choose to accept, learn and grow, regardless of how challenging it may be.

The final component of accountability is the capacity to attach meaning and significance to the events in our lives in a manner that supports us to move forward, evolve and more consciously engage in our lives.

Jay Fiset is a powerful speaker and a leader. His company, Personal Best Seminars, is a leading seminar company that provides workshops promoting self-awareness, stimulating personal growth, and personal accountability. He is committed to personal development, conscious parenting, and lifelong learning. You can visit his website here, http://www.personalbestseminars.com.

Parenting a Family in Conflict: The Night a Difficult Teen Saved Her Family From Self Destructing

The fighting went on and on below her in the living room.

Her parents were at it again.

Her kid brothers had snuck into her room, looking scared.

They sat on her bed as the voices below got louder and angrier.

She could hear little pieces of sentences they yelled.

“You always let her get away with it”

“O, if only you could lighten up and let her be”

She looked around in her room, the floor covered with clothes, her desk a mess, as usual.

As the fighting went on her stomach tightened and she held her brothers.

‘This has to stop or we’ll break apart’ she thought as she held her brothers, who clung to their older sister.

“I am going downstairs” she said to them. “I am going to stop them, ok.”

Her brothers looked up in a mixture of fear and hope. “Could she?”

For many families, parenting has become a struggle between parents with different approaches in raising their kids, parents who don’t know how to work as a team in conflict resolution. Often noticeable when kids are in elementary school, the difficulties can explode when your children become teens.

A time of peer pressure, self exploration and challenging the boundaries parents set. Differences in parenting values, in how to deal with conflicts and not knowing how to shift when kids become teens, can drive any reasonably functioning family to destruction.

Joni’s family was no different. She had pushed her parents in every way she could, trying to find the limits of her freedom, her own identity.

The differences between her parents’ parenting styles were at first easy to use for her immediate benefit. They now had become the fault line on which her family could break apart. Break, as they were fighting over her.

”Stop it!” Joni slammed the door into its frame as she yelled it. “Stop it! You are killing us as a family!” Her parents stopped, stunned by her outburst.

“I am sorry, alright, I am sorry. I don’t want us to break up. The boys are scared upstairs and you are starting to hate each other. It’s just too much!”

Her parents were still fuming at each other but their attention had shifted to their daughter.

“I am scared too” she added softly.” Please let’s try to find a different way than going at each other all the time.” Suddenly she couldn’t stop talking.

”I want a family. I don’t want you to break up. I know you love each other and that I am pushing you to all of this fighting.”

She looked up. Her parents looked at her, exhausted from the furious exchange they had a few moments ago.

“Can’t we find a way that we can all be happy? That we can all enjoy our family again?

We used to have fun and do things together, now you just work and we run around and we don’t anymore. I know that I have been a pain and that I don’t clean my room, but is that such a big deal? I want us to be happy. Don’t you want to be happy? I want to find out who I am and I need you to be my home, where I can try and test things. I don’t want us to break up.

“Please. Please don’t fight anymore. Please?” Her parents looked at her, feeling her plea, her desperation.

“I am sorry” said her mom, “you are right. These conflicts are costing us all too much. But it is not your fault alone. We need to do this differently as parents. I didn’t intend anyone to be scared.”

Her dad stood there, still boiling with anger, but shaken by his daughters outburst.
Finally he took a deep breath.

“You are right. And yes you have been pushing us and it hasn’t helped.” He sighed and looked at his wife. “And your mother is right, we as parents need to work on our part.
I am sorry. I think we both wanted the best, but it turned into wanting to be right.”

Joni burst into tears.

”I am sorry” she said, “I love you both and want you to be together.”

Her mother came over and put her arm around her.

She looked up at her husband.

“You may have just helped us to do that, love.”

Her husband looked at his wife and sunk into a chair.

“We need to do this better, we really do.”

Joni did save her family that night. And, she offered her parents a way out from self destructing their family.

Parenting is team work with others (i.e. teachers, care givers), whether you are a single parent or a couple.

Below are three steps that can help you in dealing with conflicts.

1. Always take responsibility for your thoughts, words and actions.
Stop the blame game and look at what you can do differently to help. Take a deep breath as others push your triggers and you get angry, feel hurt, and get defensive. Think about how you truly want it to be and act from that image.

2. Look at your kids, your partner/spouse, as your partners in solving issues, making decisions and creating opportunities for the whole family.
Stop reacting as if conflicts are best treated as war, with enemies, winners and losers. It is not healthy for a family. It destroys relationships.

3. Always look for win-win solutions.
Be creative, take your time, ask for others’ opinions and look out for their interest as well as your own. By looking out for each other, nobody can lose. And isn’t that what families are about?

I know you want the best for your family, for your kids.

By stepping back and seeing that they want that too, you can find ways in creating a family with ALL your perspectives and ideas.

Together, as your kids want you to.

Wouter van der Hall is a parenting expert, parenting coach and the author of The Parent Program, a 15 minute a day email/web based parenting program (www.theparentprogram.com). Wouter has worked with children and families in complex situations in child welfare in Europe and North America for decades. For parents he has combined his extensive experience with the research based team building, conflict resolution and communication tools corporations pay thousands of dollars per person for. So all children may have the best parents they can have: their own parents, with the tools to be great parents.

Success Coaching: Instant Success

As a success coach, I have a lot of fun working with energetic, motivated individuals who are eager to turn their dreams into reality. They’ve made that important step from talking about success to actually creating it.

In helping these “doers” create the necessary strategies to achieve their goals, much of my time is spent talking with them about their expectations of how quickly they can accomplish their goals. In the success coaching process, it’s not always the most enjoyable part of what we do together, but it is a very important one. After all, it’s important to have big goals to work towards, but it’s just as important to have realistic expectations about how and when those dreams can be made real.

Unfortunately, everything today is about speed and getting more done, faster than ever before. Not necessarily a bad goal, but that push for speed spills over into all aspects of our lives. We want fast service and fast results -- no matter what we’re doing.

Everywhere we look in our instant-everything environment we see examples of this: fast-food restaurants, one-hour photo stores, 10-minute oil change shops, do-it-yourself express-lane checkout, etc. We continue to move faster and faster… and we grow incredibly impatient, especially when it comes to people enjoying the fruit of our own efforts. Getting all we ever wanted just isn't enough, unless in can happen instantly.... overnight... right away... right now!

Success, however, rarely (if ever) occurs instantaneously. It comes to you on its own schedule as the result of consistent, persistent action. Rather than stressing yourself out, take things easy… take your time… stop expecting instant results. Do what needs doing and let life take its own course. This way, you can focus on working smarter and more efficiently while enjoying the process of what you’re doing.

Sure, there will be times when you get immediate results and achieve success quickly. Most of the time you’ll need to be patient… Just because you're not getting instant results doesn't mean you won't get any. If you keep working towards your goals, maintaining a sustained, consistent effort, readjusting your plans as necessary along the way, you will create the success you’re looking for.

Consider this analogy: You build a large, thousand-mile-long pipeline, from Alaska to California. You drill for oil and start pumping it into the pipeline… Now, do you have oil coming out of the other end immediately? Of course not! You have to be patient and wait a while. Eventually, the oil will start to flow at the other end, but only if you keep on drilling and filling up the pipe.

It's the same way your own efforts. You have to be patient while your work creates the success you desire. By not forcing the timetable and pushing for immediate results, you actually improve your chances of achieving your goals.

How can get a more realistic expectation of your goals? Easy...

First, make a plan before you mark your calendar. That’s right, sit down and figure out exactly how you’re going to achieve your goal. Figure out all the steps. Determine what resources you already have and which ones you need… Then write it all down, ALONG WITH your estimate of how long it will take to accomplish each individual step! Chances are your time estimates for individual steps will be more accurate than a single estimate for the entire project since you will be looking at smaller action items.

Second, with your firm-but-flexible plan in hand, make a list of potential obstacles, big and small, that could get in your way. Counterintuitive? Too negative? I don’t think so… It’s really an extension of planning that can actually save you time. Thinking about what may slow you down helps prepare you for overcoming those obstacles, thus speeding you back up. Figure out the average time delay an obstacle presents and factor that into your time estimates.

Third, and finally, look around for examples of people who have accomplished the same (or a similar) goal. Ask them how long it took them to achieve success (versus what they thought it would take)? What obstacles did they face? What surprises did they encounter along the way?

Talking with others who have done what you want to do is a great way to estimate how long it might take you. Plus, you get the added benefit of learning from other people’s experience (which, again, could save you a lot of time)!

Three very simple steps, but they can help you focus your mind on the real work necessary to make your dreams a reality.

With a more realistic sense of what can be accomplished, the more you’ll enjoy every step in the process of creating success in your life. And when you do reach your goals, you’ll see that the success you achieve is more than worth the wait.

Jim M. Allen, The Big Life Guy™, a professional success coach and success coaching guide, has been working with clients from around the world since 1999. For more ideas, visit his website, http://www.BigIdeaCoach.com or subscribe to his free ezine, The Big Idea, by going to: www.BigIdeaCoach.com/subscribe.html

Create Outrageous Success With These 10 Secret Leadership Skills

In case you didn't know it, there is a character element in love and loving relationships. People who say they love each other and then cheat on their spouse or lover, or lie to them on a regular basis, aren't really in love. Oh, many think they are, but they really are not. People who love each other have character when it comes to their marriage or relationship.

In our interviews over the past 25+ years with couples that had a successful marriage we are always struck by their undying trust in each other. They literally trust each other with their lives, their fortune, and their sacred honor. The words they use to describe the one they love more often than not include words and expressions like trust, honesty, loyalty, respects me, admires me, always there for me, never lets me down, truthful, and never lies to me. Their trust for each other is about as complete as you can get. And when we ask couples in love during our interviews to place, in an overall sense, where their relationship is on a 10-point scale with 10 being "Absolute Trust," without exception, they say "10!" Isn't that wonderful? Remarkable? These are the couples that will celebrate their golden anniversaries together!

Trust is not something all loving relationships start with. For some couples the trust becomes complete in a few years. For others, it takes awhile. But one thing is for sure; happy and successful marriages and relationships survive and thrive on the basis of this trust. Trust is so pervasive in their relationship that they never give it a second thought. They expect it. It's always there. It is part of the fabric of their marriage.

There is one thing you can take to the bank - all people in love have faced temptations in their relationship. The pretty girl in the restaurant captures your fancy. The handsome man walking down the street draws your attention. The flirt at work is tempting at times. And, we will dare say, sometimes in every relationship you think about slipping in the sack with some of the beautiful people you meet. But here's where it stops - these are only fleeting moments of passing fancy. These are the moments of momentary lust for another human being that are not acted on. Why? People in love who are happy in their relationships control their urges because they know that while a moment of sexual fantasy is healthy and normal, following through and enjoying sexual satisfaction with someone other than their mate, cheating on their mate, is destructive to the loving and trusting relationship between them. It's okay to have sexual urges and fantasies regarding another person, but to act on them ruins all that trust. It destroys the tie that binds.

Couples who are truly in love in their relationship know that a few moments of sexual satisfaction can NEVER replace the loving, trusting, and caring relationship they have developed with their mate. As someone once said to us, "I have a marriage license but I didn't give up my looking license!" Admiring others in intimate ways is normal and healthy. But acting on those urges has ruined a many a marriage and many a loving relationship.

Those wonderful couples we have interviewed resist these normal urges and temptations of life because they know their relationship is so much more important to them. Destroying the trust between them causes the foundation of their marriage to crumble.

Character in a successful marriage or relationship does matter, and character is about trust. Being honest and trustworthy is at the heart of all the best loving relationships we have studied. It really is a 10 on a 10-point scale. In our estimation, character is the foundation of true love!

With 25 years of research experience on successful marriage, love, and their own 40-year marriage, Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz know what makes marriage work. From their hundreds of interviews with happily married couples they've discovered seven pervasive characteristics present in all successful marriages.

During their distinguished careers they have received 55+ local, state, and national awards; published 70+ articles and manuscripts; delivered over 900 speeches; traveled throughout the world; and appeared on radio and television. Dr. Charles Schmitz is Dean and Professor at the University of Missouri-St. Louis and Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz is President of Successful Marriage Reflections, LLC. Visit www.goldenanniversaries.com

Basics: Starting a Business

The basics of starting a business for some people could mean just writing down on a piece of paper what needs to be done to get them from point A to point B. Others might want to know what kinds of research need to be performed to find the answer to some of these questions. To get clarifications on what your needs are, you might want to consider reading books, talking to people, or just analyzing the data already available to you.

The most important basic step of starting a business is to just do it. Getting started could mean gathering information, reading, analyzing, and putting it to use. Most important, the potential business owner should start now. If you decide to start now, there are steps you should take to get yourself organized, such as setting aside time to do daily readings. These readings will include articles, brochures, mails, and other information pertaining to the business. Remember, information is knowledge, and the more knowledge you have about the subject, the wiser it makes you.

If you know what to expect early on, it will help to alleviate some of the fears you might have about starting your own business. You have heard the saying "people perish because of lack of knowledge." You have also heard that "understanding is knowledge." The more understanding you have about what you are getting into the more confidence you will have in yourself. The more confidence you have in yourself and in your business the more successful you will become.

Like many people who want to become successful business owners, you may not know how to begin. There are many questions that you will need answers to such as “Who do you call?” “What questions do you ask?” You need to know the answer to these questions and many others to start you on the road to being a successful business owner.

You need to find ways to gain more knowledge in the areas where you are weak. Also, what to do if there is a time constraint and you need immediate assistance. By hiring someone with the particular knowledge and expertise that the business needs may solve some of your management problems. A form of good management is to “Recognize the skills that you do not have and get someone in your organization to do that work.”

In addition, you need to know the different types of businesses to help you decide which form is best for you. The entrepreneur should know the importance of preparing a business plan. You should concentrate on certain areas to properly manage your finances. Contrary to what most people believe, there is money available to help start your business. Once you receive the money, you need to know the basics on how to prepare a budget and manage your cash flow to make the most of the funds available to you.

When starting a business, you will find that you can ask for help and receive it from several people and organizations. You may contact the Small Business Administration, your banker, lawyer, and accountant. You may join professional organizations. You may also attend seminars at trade shows and the local community colleges to gain more knowledge on starting a business. You will also have your friends and family members to turn to for help.

The success of a business depends upon "sticking with it,” which includes planning, working hard, managing your time, knowing where to go and whom to ask for help, meeting your deadlines, offering quality work, and exhibiting high performance. Here’s to your business success!

Copyright © 2007, Dr. Mary E. Waters. All rights reserved.

Dr. Mary E. Waters is an author, speaker, business consultant. She is the author of “Easy Business for Women with Little or No Money.” She strives on helping people to start their own business with little or no money. For many years, she has been helping people make their dreams of becoming a successful business owner come true! The official SelfGrowth.com Guide for "Business Start-Up." Are you looking to super charge your business? Did you know that you can start a legitimate business with little or no money? Dr. Waters offers affordable online business courses 24/7. Visit: http://www.waienterprises.com, http://www.drmewaters.com

GROUND YOURSELF IN GRATITUDE

Deep in my memory there is an intense, black and white picture of a mother squatting next to her small son surrounded by barren land in Korea. The caption underneath reads, “Where will their food come from now?” Printed by our Sunday Journal many years ago, it made me feel sad that they didn’t have any food and lucky that I was born in America and did not have to worry about food. In fact it never occurred to me to even think about where my food came from. It was a blessing I took for granted.

Life seemed simpler then. As children, we played all day long worry free, at the vacant corner lot. Men listened to the ball game on their front porch after a hard day at work. The smell of dinner lingered from the kitchen stove. Neighbors said hello to each other as they passed by on their early evening walk. Television had just been introduced and most people did not have it. We listened to music and loved to sing and dance.

Today, rushing seems to be the norm and life is much more complicated. Children cannot go
outside to play even in front of their own home without fear of being taken or shot. Many parents are in front of the TV after work, eating fast food purchased on the way home after picking the children up from Day Care. The local and national daily news reports tragedy, crime and murder twenty-four hours a day. Obesity is a national crisis and though we live longer, our quality of life is questionable.

Those of us who remember, long for those simpler times, wondering if they are gone forever.
Unable to turn back time we beg the question, “Is there anything that will make our lives and the lives of our loved ones simpler? Can we slow down on this fast-paced road to the slaughter of
stress? Is there a magic formula? Does it have a name? Is it simple? Remember, I don’t have
much time.”

If you are speeding through your life, chances are you are whining and wailing and missing
out on the blessings that are right in front of you just like I was. Imagine a tiny shift in your
perception moving you into a state of joy. Something to reactivate your thinking and make your
life work again. Living in gratitude and counting your blessings is that something. Each moment
counts when we are grateful for it.

Everything begins with a thought. Thoughts are mental whispers that give direction to our
lives. They set the tone for our day. Check it out. When you first wake up in the morning are you
thinking happy thoughts, inspiring thoughts, uplifting and healthy thoughts? Are you seeing th
world partly sunny instead of partly cloudy before you even open your eyes? Or, are you, like so
many others feeling tired and grumpy because you’re already focusing on unpleasantries before
your feet reach the floor?

If you would like to snap out of those doldrums while still warm and cozy under the covers,
think of five things that you are grateful for in the very first moment after you wake. If you have
difficulty coming up with something, hold your breath for a minute or two. Or, imagine yourself
being newly blinded or having lost the ability to smell. What if you had experienced an auto
accident the day before that had left you paralyzed from the neck down and this was your first
day of awakening to it? What if you were that woman or her son that had been born in a Country
torn apart by war? Can you see how much you have to be grateful for even before you get out of
bed?

But there’s more to it than that. Before long you will realize that everything is connected to
everything else. Take for example a beautiful flower. Without its stem and leaves and a root
system that grows in the ground, loving the sun and the water, it just wouldn’t be. It is the same
with us. We have a mind and a body, food to eat, clothes on our back, a home to live in, a place
to work, furniture to sit on, money to purchase things, and friends and family to share with. The
list of things we have to be grateful for is endless.

Counting our blessings is such a simple concept that most of us miss the importance of it.
Instead of focusing on all the good in our lives, our lopsided perceptions have us moaning and
complaining about things we can’t do anything about. Taxes, the weather, the raise we didn’t
get. The American way, that many of us so often find fault with. But what if, just what if, you
had been that women or her son, whose memory pops up every so often in my mind? Where do
you think you would be today? How much would you have to be grateful for? Is it possible their
experience of gratitude would be more sincere because they had less and appreciated more?

When I first began to focus my attention on gratitude, I was amazed at life’s new meanin
for me. I felt I was seeing and hearing things for the very first time. The early morning song bird
was singing just for me. The flowering crab apple trees in spring were like fourth of July
firecrackers standing still so I could enjoy them all day long. I welcomed the gray clouds with
each falling rain that provided relief for our parched earth. And the pure white of winter snows
was renewing and refreshing. But my newfound love for the abundance of nature could not
compare to the newfound love I felt in my heart for my family and friends. By seeing their good
in a new light and expressing my gratitude for them, each relationship is more comfortable, feels
more loving, and we are having more fun. Remember the words of Abraham Lincoln, “A person
is just about as happy as he makes up his mind to be.” And by choosing gratitude you will be
happier. You will begin to notice your good just by paying closer attention to it. In my opinion
it’s insane to live without gratitude.

And finally, the real secret of gratitude is that the more you are grateful for, the more you

will have to be grateful for. Life is a gift, be grateful for each present moment.

Katherine Scherer and Eileen Bodoh are authors of "Gratitude Works: Open Your Heart to Love”, and E-books "Gratitude Works Journal" and "Gratitude Works Prayer Book." They are contributing authors in "101 Great Ways to Improve Your Health" published by SelfGrowth.com and the Thank God I Book Series forthcoming in 2008. Katherine and Eileen's diverse backgrounds include owning and operating a business, chairing non-profit community groups, developing a holistic health conference, facilitating self-improvement groups, hospice volunteer training, and training in parent education. Their mission is to touch lives with the spirit of gratitude. Please visit www.gratitudeworks.com

Public Speaking: Talk To Your Audience, Not AT Them

One of the secrets for becoming a dynamic public speaker is to make eye contact with your audience. While there are some courses on presentation skills or public speaking that teach you to stare at an object on the wall in order to eliminate your nervousness, I couldn’t disagree more.

Forget trying to eliminate your nervousness. However, nervousness affects you – be it that extra spurt of adrenaline (also known as the rush), your heart beating faster, those knots in your stomach – let it work for you, not against you. All great performers, great actors, great athletes, and great public speakers experience nervousness. If you think they don’t, then you are wrong. Their nervousness is one of the characteristics which helps make them great. The answer lies in learning how to control the nervousness, not eliminate it.

I teach what I refer to as the 5 characteristics of a dynamic public speaker and each one of those characteristics helps you control your nervousness as well. Making eye contact with your audience is one of those characteristics and it is invaluable because once you are able to look into the eyes of your listeners, you are then taking the first step in being conversational with your audience. Many people are under the mistaken belief that when they stand at the lectern, on the podium or at the boardroom table, they should be someone other than who they are. That is wrong. The person you are in your office or in your home, in a social situation or a business setting, is the person that should be giving that speech or that presentation. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. First and foremost, be yourself

What you will also discover when you make eye contact is that you have smilers. Every audience has its smilers. So the next step is to focus on those smilers: they make you feel good, they bolster your confidence. And, because they are smiling, you will think they are in agreement with you, again, bolstering your confidence, another means for you to take control of that nervousness. The smilers will be located throughout your audience so when you zero in on the person smiling on your left for example, everyone in that area will think you are looking them.

Remember too, that if you will have people on your left, in the center, and to your right. Do not focus just on one section. Move your gaze from the left to the center and to the right. Recently I heard a speaker who did move his head from one side to the other; however, his gaze was so very brief that I realized he wasn’t making eye contact with anyone. It was quite disconcerting because I knew that he was just spitting out words – he was not communicating.

Next you must prepare for your sleepers. Just as every audience has its smilers, so too, every audience has a sleeper or two. Sleepers may tell you that they listen with their eyes closed. That is fine. But truly you may have someone sound asleep. My very first paid speaking engagement was to a group of professional secretaries. A woman in the front row, a retired secretary who probably got out once a month for this meeting, fell soundly asleep within the first 10 minutes of my presentation. I was aghast, thinking I must have been terribly boring. (She was snoring to boot!) The moment I finished, however, a woman in the back of the room stood and asked me if I would agree to be their guest speaker at their yearly conference. That’s when I realized an occasional sleeper is okay! If, on the other hand, your entire audience is asleep, I suggest you change jobs!

Public speaking is a marvelous means of communicating with others. You may be giving a persuasive presentation, you may be talking about a harrowing experience, you may be there as the after-dinner entertainment. Whatever your reason to stand and speak in front of others, remember that when you learn to talk TO your audience and not AT them, you are then acknowledging that audience. By acknowledging them, you become more personal, more intimate, treating them just as if you were having a conversation in your living room. That is one of the secrets to become a dynamic public speaker.

Nancy Daniels is a voice specialist, public speaking expert, and president of Voice Dynamic. Working privately and corporately, she launched Voicing It! in April of 2006, the first video training course on voice improvement. You can watch a clip from her DVD on her website, ‘before’ & ‘after’ takes of her clients, and a 16-minute video in which Nancy describes what voice training can do for you at http://www.voicedynamic.com/products.htm

Self Realization: Coming Full ‘ircle

What if you are doing your life perfectly? What if the things that you think are failings on your part are not really failings at all? Has it ever occurred to you that as a child you perfectly absorbed information from your environment, learning wholeheartedly when your brain was not yet able to discern truth from fiction nor to apply reason and thought?

Our friends Amy and Andy have a beautiful little boy, Alex. We were privileged to be at the hospital when he was born and have watched him on his journey from infancy to early childhood.

At the ripe old age of 22 months, you could see that Alex had learned many things, demonstrating that he clearly knew the difference between hard and soft. When Alex wanted to express his displeasure at not getting his way (like being asked to eat the Cheerios from a small baggie rather than from the big box he wanted to hold) he would throw himself on the floor in an impressive display of histrionics. The velocity of Alex’s descent to the floor depended on which room of the house he was in during his meltdown. In the family room, he did a full-fledged flop since the floor has thick carpeting. But Alex was more cautious on the wood floors and avoided landing on stone if he could help it. One time, he got upset while he was on the brick walkway leading to the front door. He prepared himself for a full tilt fit but managed to stop the action before hitting brick. He actually picked himself up and walked the few feet to the cushy welcome mat before “spontaneously” throwing himself down to cry.

Yes, Alex had learned well and his little boy mind had collected all sorts of useful information, causing him to feel passionately about many things. When Alex was 15 months old he discovered circles. For some time, Alex was like an investigative reporter, on the hunt for anything round that he could point out with glee to his parents, and to anyone who would listen. “‘ircle!” Alex would shout. It seems that while his brain was able to identify the shape, his mouth could not yet form the “S” sound at the beginning of the word. So instead of being surrounded by circular shapes, Alex’s world was inhabited by “‘ircles.”

Alex could find ‘ircles anywhere – the balloon motif around the ceiling at the doctor’s office, a clock face, a ball. The MasterCardTM logo once sent Alex into a frenzy when he realized it had two overlapping ‘ircles. It often surprised his parents that round shapes, even if they were simply a part of the background environment, could be spotlighted by Alex’s nimble mind. Amy and Andy found the passion their son had for ‘ircles endearing. They did however, from time-to-time, feel concerned that Alex couldn’t pronounce the word correctly. They could only hope that sooner or later Alex would be able to fix his earlier mistake in pronunciation when his ability to speak caught up with his powers of observation.

One day, while casually leaning on the doorframe watching his son play, Andy had a stunning revelation. Alex was on all fours, rolling a big yellow school bus back and forth, one of his favorite toys. On the side of the bus were four shapes: a triangle, a square, a heart and a circle. Plopping on his behind, Alex pushed the triangle and when the button was depressed, the electronic voice exclaimed, “Triangle!” When Alex hit the square, the voice called out, “Square!” and then he pushed the big round button and the machine hollered, “‘ircle!”

Astounded, Andy came into the room, knelt by his son and pushed the button. Again the toy faithfully repeated, “‘ircle!” Alex could make the “S” sound. It was not his mistake. He had learned perfectly, and with passion, to say ‘ircle instead of circle from a defective toy.

All of us have learned how to behave and relate from things we put together as youngsters or by things we absorbed from our environment. But that was before we had the benefit of discerning whether or not we were getting complete or accurate information.

As you go through life, it’s very easy to blame one’s parents or teachers or environment and say they were bad role models or deficient in some way. But stop and think. Those people you may seek to blame also learned and absorbed from their environments without their young minds being able to discern truth from fiction or apply reason and thought.

Just the way Andy discovered the defective audio in the toy while watching his son, you can also discover how you function. Casually lean on the doorframe of your life and observe how you operate without judging what you discover. You will be instantaneously empowered to include small details that were omitted. If you can treat yourself with humor, love and respect, much like you would a young child who is learning from his or her environment, you will reclaim your wholehearted nature and passion for living. When you allow yourself to come full ‘ircle, and rediscover the art of self-observation without self-reproach, it will have a profound impact on your well-being.

The above is an excerpt from Ariel and Shya Kane’s new book, Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment, available in September 2007. Internationally acclaimed seminar leaders, Self Realization experts, and award-winning authors, the Kanes lead evening and weekend groups in Manhattan dedicated to supporting people in living in the moment and having extraordinary, fulfilling lives. Their books and audios are available at local and online bookstores and via their website. For more information, including workshop dates and locations, call 908-479-6034, or visit their website: www.ask-inc.com.

Career Coaching: Seven Mistakes to Avoid When Making a Big Career Change

Are you considering a big change in your career? Do you feel let down, bored, burned out? Maybe you think there is something bigger and more meaningful that you are meant to do. Perhaps your company downsized you into this predicament. Regardless of the reason, there are some common mistakes to avoid while you evaluate and select new career options. Avoid these pitfalls and you can stay motivated, keep your balance and move forward successfully.

Mistake #1 – Making Decisions in Haste

Tempted to just quit and wing it? Everyone is now and then, but unless you just can’t stand your current situation another day, resist! Instead, write down everything you hate about your current situation, then one by one, look at the most intolerable issues and see how you can turn each around to make it more tolerable for the present moment.

It is easy to get so excited about the future that you decide to forge ahead without a plan and hope everything naturally falls your way after that. It will require more energy to sustain your new career and make it work well for you than it will to identify and start it. It is better to come from a place of higher energy and stability than to start out already burned out or worried about how you will pay the bills. Consider seeking the help of a qualified career coach, life coach or career counselor to help you identify your next career path. An objective, trained third party can help you strategize and phase it in for the best results and the least amount of heartache.

Mistake #2 – Ignoring the Finances

“I can’t stand this any longer! I would rather eat dog food than put up with this another day!” Whether you are pursuing a new career voluntarily or involuntarily, you must pay the bills. Do pursue your dream. Do look for the career that brings out the best in you. If you have plenty of savings, good for you! Resist the temptation to go through it and be left without. If you have a dream, by all means hang on to it! But if it won’t realistically get off the ground for three years, find another way to earn a living in the meantime. The need for income is a reality you cannot ignore.

Mistake #3 – Filling Your Head with Negative Stuff

What do you read? What do you view on television or the Internet? With whom do you spend free time? When you’re looking at making big life and career changes, you need lots of positive energy around you. If you spend time with negative people or fill your mind with anything that isn’t useful, guess what? It fills you with negative energy. Instead, surround yourself with people and things that give you positive energy and encouragement. Read books that motivate and encourage you. Go places that inspire you. Do everything you can to be what you want to be like after you land the next great career opportunity, and you will be more likely to attract it into your life!

Mistake #4 – Getting Bogged Down by Decisions

If you’re an intelligent person who has enjoyed any measure of success, chances are there are a lot of different choices you could make in your next big life or career change. Clients often tell me they are overwhelmed by all of the thoughts and ideas that keep running through their minds. And as the overwhelm sets in, it is very easy to just shut down. As we work together, I remind clients when making tough decisions to ask themselves, “Is this going to move me forward?” If the answer is yes, proceed. If the answer is no, either revise the decision or drop it entirely.

Mistake #5 - Not Having a Plan

There are two reasons this is important. First, life is unpredictable and it is dangerous to relinquish security before the next career arrangement is lined up. Second, changing careers is a lot like dating. You are always more desirable when you are unavailable. You are more attractive to a prospective employer if you are already working. And if you have already lost your job either voluntarily or involuntarily, it is even more important to have a plan so that you are then more likely to achieve it. If you see success, you will be successful. (Conversely, if you don't have a plan, how will you know when you've succeeded?)

Mistake #6 - Ending your Preparation Too Soon

All I can say here is, prepare, prepare, prepare. If you’re looking at several possibilities, don’t immediately drop one when another looks good. Think about all of the big tests you have taken in life (college entrance exams, finals, certification exams) and how you prepared for those. Did you study way in advance and take a big, long break before taking the test? Or were you still reading the material as you walked in the door on test day, wondering if you could still be better prepared? When you’re embarking on a new career or life change, give it all of your available energy, skills and attention. If you have a goal in mind, resist relaxing when you think you almost have it. Prepare and stay sharp right up until the day you start. This will help keep you from losing confidence at the last minute.

Mistake #7 – Getting Discouraged Too Easily

Does this happen to you when you face hurdles in the midst of your goal? Instead of giving in to the pain, pay attention to what specifically is making you uncomfortable and make adjustments to get you through. For example, if you're in career transition and you find that it is painful to go through the tedium of making phone calls, sending resumes, going on interviews where the competition is tough, etc., find the formula that gives you a break without stopping the process. Try devoting an hour or two each morning to these tasks and letting it go for the rest of the day, or only making a certain number of phone calls or interview appointments per week so that when you're finished, you can feel good about giving yourself some time off. Don't stop. Adjust.

Remember, a career change is a life change. You didn’t arrive at your current level of education and experience overnight, and don’t be disappointed if you don’t immediately uncover “the thing” you want to do next. Allow yourself time and space to explore and make an educated decision. Get the help you need along the way (i.e., career coach, career counselor) to help you do it strategically, not emotionally. If you avoid these mistakes you are much more likely to end up in a new career that complements and fulfills your life.

Gwen Jewett is a Life and Career Coach and Selfgrowth.com Guide to Career Coaching, living in the Dallas area. After 14 years as Executive Director of a 12,000-member national healthcare association, she voluntarily left to pursue a more balanced life. Since 2001 she has helped many clients make their career and personal life stop working against each other and instead work in complement. www.coachgwen.com

Purpose of Life: Using Ancient Energies to Live Your Purpose Today

We humans are encoded to search out our reason for being and then express it. When we are not living on purpose, we know it; we are unhappy, we feel isolated, things don’t flow in our lives and our bodies reflect it. But when we ARE living in the rhythm of our unique purpose, we feel it.

Through the ages, we’ve spent a lot of time figuring out how to express our inner being in a tangible outer way. Spiritual teachers, gurus, poets, artists, philosophers, inventors and, well, people who have gone before us have left us the roadmap of “living on purpose”. While there is a process to expressing our purpose that we access regularly (whether knowingly or not), it is helpful to understand what purpose is - and is not.

Living on Purpose is NOT…

Living on purpose is NOT a big production, contrary to popular opinion. When something is real, it doesn’t need trumpets to announce its authenticity - it just is. Looking to the outside to validate our inside doesn’t give us what we seek – that merely limits us because we are lacking self-trust. It’s the little ways that our purpose moves us forward that creates the results that matter.

It is NOT about a job or career. A job is the way we exchange our energy with the world in such a way as to be paid either for our time or our value, which can be two different things. An innate purpose expresses itself through us whether we are being paid for it or not.

It is NOT about being in bliss every single waking moment. Somehow, we have confused living on purpose with being in paradise. Just because we are on purpose doesn’t mean the people around us are, or that we magically have everything we want at the snap of our fingers. It means that we are making decisions from our true values, speaking authentically, and are aligned with our gifts and core essence rather than living a glamorous idealization. Living on purpose requires a humility that can be painful in reality – for an extreme example, consider Joan of Arc.

It is NOT defined outside of you. While you are an expression of source energy, it – and your purpose - is a part of you. You have free will in determining how to express it, but your purpose is within you. Regardless of the situation, your purpose reveals itself; for example, a healer makes people feel better but that doesn’t mean s/he is a medical professional. Your purpose is known internally and you choose the outer expression of it.

Living on Purpose IS…

Living on purpose IS about who you are and how you show up on a daily basis. In fact, you can choose how to express your purpose through everyday choices – from relationships to careers to pursuing your interests – and then watch as whatever is not in alignment with your purpose eventually falls away.

It IS about the challenges of staying your course; that is, living your purpose causes you to grow through challenge, leave people, beliefs and situations behind as you develop beyond them, and live with the uncertainty of what’s coming next even as you know that it’s right. Sometimes it means not having the resources you need to be ready – and doing it anyway.

It IS creating as you go. It’s a dynamic process that means you are never wrong or in the wrong place; rather, you are always where you need to be to get the information that will take you from where you are to get you to where you want / need to be.

It IS about being in harmony with your own nature. This is trickier than it sounds because it means complete self-acceptance of all of your parts, even the not-so-pretty ones because, when loved, all of your parts become radiant and purposeful. This is all about you, and no one else. If you are not in harmony with yourself, it is impossible to be in harmony with your true purpose.

Ancient Energies for Understanding

Using ancient energies as a compass to live your purpose means understanding there are rhythms that underlie all of life in every moment, and being aware of your unique ability to merge with, and express, that source energy. Said another way, you have access to the same simple and timeless awareness that has inspired and supported every living being to express their special reason for being through the ages. You can access that awareness through various key points for guidance to your own purpose, including the following.

Watch nature for symbols, signs, cycles and flow in order to apply what you see to your own experience of your life purpose. Everything in nature has information about the gap between how you are living and how you are meant to live on purpose.

Look at the world around you; that is, everyone and everything around you are the mirrors that reflect the choices you’ve made and how you’re showing up in the world. If you don’t like what you see, you’re not living on purpose.

Be present for yourself. Feel your feelings fully to acknowledge them as messengers for your truth. Be in the moment (vs. living in the past or projecting into the future); stay “here” and let go of what’s not working right now. Incidentally, it’s not about judging good or bad but, rather, if “it” is serving you or not. If not, let it go.

Honor who you are; don’t take yourself for granted. You are an amazing and unique individual who has a purpose that is yours alone. By knowing that you are precious to the universe and taking care of yourself accordingly, it is where you begin to honor your purpose.

Accept that all is right up until now. You are where you are because you needed to gain experience, learn and grow. There is no shame in where you’ve been, or even in being stuck, up until now. Accepting your role in expressing your purpose means that you have the power to create a different future. As you take responsibility for what you’ve learned, your life –your purpose – becomes “cleaner”.

You will find that your purpose expresses in direct proportion to how well you know yourself. Living on purpose means knowing yourself well enough to know what makes you feel lit up from the inside out most of the time. Your purpose is the expression of universal being. Perhaps Shakespeare summed it up best when he simply said, “To Thine Own Self Be True”. And you’ll know when you are…

Lynn Scheurell, Creative Catalyst and Selfgrowth.com Purpose of Life expert, helps conscious entrepreneurs strengthen their inner systems, both personal and professional, for faster business results. She teaches renaissance souls how to gain clarity on their purpose by remembering who they are from their essential self, then aligning everything they do to express their unique gift through their business while working with natural energies for maximum support. Register for a free GEENI™ for Change e-course to learn how to upgrade your life in just seven days at www.mycreativecatalyst.com.

Spiritual Guides: Fear – Fear Is An illness

This is a meditative prayer to be said each night for one month before you lay your body down to rest for the night:

“I see tremendous colored balloons filled with helium. These balloons are carrying all of my troubles, all of my frustrations, all of my heartache up and away. These balloons float higher and higher away from me until the sky is a clear blue. Now, I am free and have no fears.”

We must educate ourselves to think along these lines each evening before releasing our spirit to the Father. The Father works to cleanse the mind of all ill-conceived thoughts during this period of time. Enter into blissfulness with the Father, allowing your body, soul, and spirit to rest with Him.

Love is the demonstration of the Lord’s way of life. That is the way He meant mankind to live – with love of oneself and for all of mankind. To preserve life and to elevate the quality of life is to rid one’s mind of illness. When we understand how to rid our minds of illness, we begin to understand how the Father meant us to live.

The most pressing problem for mankind is to learn how to get rid of fear. Fear is the devastation felt and seen among men. Fear is what causes illness, for it places the complete body, the psyche, into disarray, setting loose forces within the psyche or mind of mankind known as “psychosomatic illness”.

We must look ahead without fear, having deep faith. The Father observes the cause of the unrest within us and He sets up guards to diffuse the problems. We should have faith and try to understand His teachings, the teachings of truth. Fruit comes to those who believe; fruit comes to those who try to help themselves by exploring their own mind, by simulating the Lord’s mind within themselves.

Diffuse your troubles by believing first in the Father, second in His obstinacy to treat all men equally. He tries so hard to diffuse and rid your mind of troubles. He tries to lead us and get us back on the pathway of life again, once we stumble and fall. We must listen very intently to His thoughts. He is diffusing our thinking with thoughts of love, and He fills our lives with understanding of how to help ourselves. We must learn to listen more intently and follow His guidance. There is no illness on earth created by the Father!

The individual inflicts punishment upon his own body by ill-conceived thoughts because of frustrations; because of things he wants to obtain—things he thinks he cannot bring to fruition. Once we establish the cause of our frustration, it is very easy to rid ourselves of it by facing it frontally and listening to the Father for the cure. It is all there, instant relief, because we can rid our minds of all ill-conceived thoughts.

Every man can change his complete life around if he will but listen, work for a change, and have faith that with the Father’s help, it can be accomplished.

LIFE IS LOVE.

WITHOUT LOVE, THERE IS NO REAL LIVING.

LOVE IS LIFE WITHOUT FEAR

Affirmation: Say to yourself, “I will live close to the Father daily. I will sense His will. I will sense His thinking. Trouble cannot come into my life as long as the Father assures me of this truth, for then I can assure myself of a happy life without fear. My life shall be an example among mankind. No harm can come into my life. He lives close to me, to show me the way out of all my troubles. I evince no fear, for the Lord watches over me.”

This column is brought to you by PESHA Publishing. The author, Bess S. Permut, is a spiritual guides expert, graduate student of psychology, philosophy, has taught spiritual awareness for over 40 years and is the author of two books on these subjects. Her purpose is to relay the truth as it was originally taught by the Father. She receives no financial gain or aggrandizement. All profits from her books go to charity. For more information go to www.peshaonline.com.

Seven Gateways to Happiness A Positive Psychology Method for Increased Happiness

What are the tools to get to THE ENCHANTED SELF® part of ourselves? What skills do we need in order to find happiness that is unique and sustainable for each person?

This paper outlines the positive psychology methods that you need to employ to enter each of the “Seven Gateways to Happiness.”

First Gateway: Honoring what is Right about Ourselves Rather Than What is Wrong

As women, we're all experts in identifying what is wrong with ourselves. We can probably quickly make up a long list, detailing what is wrong in our lives. However, it's a lot harder to get in touch with what is right. We need to know ourselves in positive ways. We need to learn how to honor our talents, strengths, even our coping skills which serve us so well. And most important, we need to treasure and enjoy our potential.

These parts of us, if not honored, identified and talked about both to ourselves and to others, will lose their power. We have to keep igniting them. We need to get to know ourselves in ways that emphasize the heroic, strong parts of ourselves. This means using our memories in very different ways from what we've been accustomed to. It means searching through our history to find our talents, strengths and even lost potential, even if we have to sort through pounds of dysfunction. It means searching our past for what is right about ourselves, not for what is wrong.

Gateway Two: Falling in Love with Ourselves

This is an extremely important gateway. This gateway is achieved after we have made efforts to reclaim and honor our talents, capacities, strengths, lost potential and coping skills. Now we are ready. We no longer break our hearts by putting ourselves down and saying "No, no, you can't do that," or "You're stupid." Now we are ready to say, "Yes, I love myself. I have a lot to offer. I am capable of having fun. I am capable of doing good, and no one can sidetrack me from who I really am."

When you fall in love with yourself, you begin to feel the positive self-esteem that comes when we don't deflate ourselves. You're ready to take yourself out for tea or to that wonderful spa for a day, or to go back and play the piano, which you always wanted to do. You're ready to recognize all the tools of wisdom that you have to offer. You're ready

to recognize that you have an Enchanted Self that deserves to be part of your every day. When you love yourself, you know when you need help. You know when you need guidance. It isn't a narcissistic love where you feel that you are perfect. It's a love of yourself, as you would love a child. If the child is ill, you take the child to the doctor. If the child comes home with a good paper from school, you put it on the refrigerator. It's a self-acknowledgment that makes you viable, real, and whole. Now you've become really ready to see the story of your life in a positive light. Even the disappointments, even tragedies have served only to hone you like tempered steel. You've been through the battles and have emerged stronger. You're in charge of your own self, a most wonderful feeling!

Gateway Three: Learning to Meet Our Needs and Negotiate Successfully

There's nothing more demoralizing than a woman who does not know how to speak up for herself, who doesn't have a voice for herself. When we feel ignored or not understood, we can feel rage and anger building. Often as women we find ourselves in a predicament where we don't know how to speak up. We simply don't know how to negotiate for what we want. While sometimes it's a cultural attitude that we've taken on, for instance that women should be demure, quiet, and modest, often it's due to a lack of understanding the appropriate skill-set necessary for negotiating effectively. All of these factors put a tremendous pressure on our true capacities. Our future happiness or fulfillment is restricted simply because we don't know the right road to get there.

Learning how to meet our needs and how to negotiate appropriately is a lot of work, but the satisfaction far outweighs the work. When you have been able to speak with integrity

to a husband, mother-in-law or a boss, when you have been able to finish a level of training that moves you ahead professionally, you're really living your Enchanted Self.

You feel as special as you deserve to feel. It's worth every moment of effort.

Gateway Four: Replenishment - Truly coming home to our Enchanted Self

Replenishment, joy, pleasure and delight are all parts of truly coming home to our Enchanted Selves. If any gateway is the pivotal gateway for a woman, it is this gateway.

This is the gateway that we must return to above all others, as frequently as possible. It is where we fuel up, where we energize. It is where we fill ourselves again so that we can meet the needs of others, be the caretakers of the world, bring up our children, spend time with the elderly, and do the hundreds of womanly tasks that we do, including having a full time job and running a home.

It may seem strange to you at first, but the smartest way to fill up again once we’ve become depleted is to bring personal satisfaction and replenishment back into our own lives. This means really knowing who you are, loving yourself and knowing how to meet your needs. If you feel rejuvenated after a great game of tennis, then that works for you. If you try to fill up by going to a comedy performance or having a massage, you may remain on empty if it isn't right for you. Choosing what is right differs from person to person, so invest some good thought into finding out what is right for yourself. In THE ENCHANTED SELF: A Positive Therapy, I teach how to sort through your memories to get to know yourself, so that you can really tune in on the best forms of replenishment, joy and pleasure for you. A general rule of thumb is to look for what has felt good in the past, and try to either duplicate it or find a way to transform the activity into a form that works for your present stage of life. For example, a long swim in a lake in childhood might now be light swimming, walking in the pool at the local “Y,” and a cup of coffee!

Gateway Five: Coming Home or Going Away, Finding Tribes in Which to Belong

As women we find ourselves automatically belonging to certain groups. There's the family we're born into, the family we may have created through marriage, and all sorts of other groups going on in our lives: PTA groups, office colleagues and church affiliations, etc.

Many women don't realize how critical it is to belong to groups. Depression feeds very quickly off of isolation. By nature most women not only share commonly in our care taking and in our concerns about others, but we enjoy and thrive when we're a part of the right groups. We want to be connected. We don't want to be isolated.

Choosing the right groups, the right tribes to belong to, is part of the dilemma and the wonderment of going through adult life. While our children don't always have much freedom in choosing what groups they belong to, sometimes they can be so greatly against an activity that we finally let them quit. We may let them leave the Girl Scouts or little league, or perhaps stop taking piano lessons, thus letting them make their own determinations.

But we, as adult women, can on the whole always have the privilege and luxury of picking our groups. It may well be time, as your children get older, to say "goodbye" forever to the PTA. It may be time to find a religious affiliation that is or is not connected to your heritage or what you were initially exposed to.

Gateway Six: Sharing Our Wisdom, Mentoring and Being Mentored

As women, we live in a golden age. We have more education than women have historically had access to. We live longer; we're healthier; we look better. Everything is really in our favor if we know how to absorb and share our wisdom and knowledge. The key to making use of all our opportunities, and maybe even the key to a happy and healthy longevity, is learning what we need to learn. What a lot of women don't realize is that mentoring can come in many different forms. I can be sitting with an 85-year-old

woman and in listening to the story of her life have my heart warmed and my courage heightened, just by hearing the things she's had to deal with and live through in her many years. I can also be in the presence of a two-year-old and learn the infectious, delightful nature of laughter once more, a lesson I may have forgotten too often. I can be taking a walk at the shore, listening to the sounds of the ocean waves and letting them soothe me, reminding me of the constancy of Mother Nature and her efforts to keep the world whole and in rhythm. Wherever a woman passes in her life, she can be giving and receiving profound levels of exchange with nature and with other people of all ages and all stages of life. This is indeed what the good life is all about.

Gateway Seven: Positive Action, Remember the Notion of a Good Deed

This Gateway is the gateway of positive action, or “Why not do a good deed, it can’t hurt!” We're all faced with bouts of discouragement, letdowns and disappointments, and for women, certainly the cycle of life itself has its ups and downs. Anyone fortunate enough to have longevity on her side will inevitably sustain losses and disappointments. None of the Gateways to Happiness can totally prevent a person from the necessary bumps and grinds of life, but what they do provide are mechanisms not only with which to pick ourselves up heroically, but to strengthen ourselves and make the world a better place for us. One of the very best ways to do this is through positive action. I look at positive action in three ways.

For one thing, it's good practice to take positive action, whether it's about a personal issue in your own life, or to help others. This forces us to practice timeliness, good behaviors, and often good logic and decision-making.

Secondly, taking positive action can definitely help offset loneliness, letdown feelings, and feelings of discouragement. It does this by the act of pushing us into connecting with people, sharing with people and having the opportunity to experience the happiness shared by others when they are affected by something positive that we do. The cliché, “A smile is more infectious than a frown,” definitely holds true in this case.

Thirdly, doing positive action helps us to grow emotionally and spiritually. And it helps the world at large. It is a win-win for everybody and everything alive.

Positive psychology in general and the Enchanted Self Gateways to Happiness emphasize how important and how much fun it can be to rediscover the best of ourselves.

I wish you good luck and good times as you enter the Gateways to Happiness!

Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is a Positive Psychology expert and the author of THE ENCHANTED SELF: A Positive Therapy, RECIPES FOR ENCHANTMENT: The Secret Ingredient is YOU!, There Comes a Time in Every Woman’s Life for DELIGHT! and her latest book THE TRUTH, I’m Ten, I’m Smart and I Know Everything! Originator of THE ENCHANTED SELF®, Dedicated to Delight, Purpose and of course, Feeling Good About Ourselves! The Enchanted Self - Dr. Barbara Holstein.

Meditation is a Quiet Revolution

For over 30 years, I have been meditating. For almost as many years, in workshops, consultations, friendly conversations, and writing, I have been encouraging, teaching, or leading people to meditate and create quiet times. During this time, the world has changed considerably, and so have I. My most important learning is: everyone is different. Certainly there are commonalities in meditating, but each individual is unique. I consider that meditation is one of the most empowering practices that anyone can engage in.

A "quiet revolution" is an oxymoron, of course. Meditation is generally a private, quiet practice. In North America its acceptance has changed dramatically over the last several years, although it is still not universally accepted. As with most revolutions, an underground is established before, during, and after the outward manifestations of the awakening. In this culture which I know, more and more individuals are speaking and writing about their meditation practice.

Meditating in groups is also common and very powerful, and yet each meditator still has a unique, quiet, private experience. In the workplace, meditation is rarely practiced openly, nor is it discussed, except in safe, small groups or among friends. When I was a frequent workshop presenter, I had many participants speak to me privately in hushed tones at break times to confess that they meditate. The voices may not be as hushed these days, but still there is a quietness, even a silence, about the practice in many settings.

I am comfortable with the variety of words used to describe meditation. My own purpose for meditation is to connect with the Divine and be replenished by the Source. Some speak about mystical experiences and higher consciousness, while others are more comfortable talking about relaxation, calmness, and resilience. Heightened awareness, intuition, imagery, and vision are frequently used to describe experiences of meditation. I find that helping others to express their own meditation experiences is a powerful process for them, even when the words do not flow smoothly.

Long-time meditators can find other long-time mediators easily. Meditators give off signals or vibrations that are calmer and more aligned with self than those who do not meditate or do not have a meditative-type practice that taps into higher consciousness. Gardening, yoga, certain athletic activities, and regular relaxation can achieve the same soothing signals when practiced in ways that achieve harmony with self.

No matter how or where you meditate, you must make a choice to meditate and practice it regularly in order to benefit fully. Full benefits come with regular practice over a period of time. Meditating only when stressed may certainly be beneficial in the immediate situation, but the long-term benefits of a regular practice include general well-being, health, a strong immune system, longevity, clarity of thought, and balance.

Meditation is sometimes associated with certain religions. Meditation can be practiced in any and all religions, but the two are not synonymous. In my work, I keep meditation distinct from religion; if my clients choose to join the two, that is fine. Those with strong religious beliefs gravitate to the types of meditation that fit their beliefs. Wikipedia has a comprehensive listing of meditation methods.

Regardless of the chosen method, the benefits of regular meditation, over time, are as varied as the individuals who meditate. It is quite common for long-time meditators to acknowledge they benefit physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Recently I received an email message from a long-time meditator in India talking about her meditation experiences. It was a delight to read. It became clear to me that she has integrated the same elements that I encourage people to discover and use.

She uses her breath to relax. She has several processes to handle mind chatter and stress so that she is not disturbed by them in her meditation. She has two different "focal points" for her attention. One is a visual focus, a traditional Indian lamp, which she visualizes as divine light that lightens her heart. Another focal point is one of the most famous mantras, Om, which she chants repeatedly, finding that it takes only a brief time to achieve the state of consciousness that is her purpose for meditation. And she has a regular practice.

Her message was a beautiful summary of what many long-term meditators might report. While working with both new and long-time meditators, I have discovered that the most difficult aspect of meditation is to practice it regularly. All the elements of meditation are easy to understand, but to sit and do it challenges many new meditators.

If you have not meditated before, it may seem mysterious. However, meditation is simple. I recommend a maximum of twenty minutes for new meditators. Here are the elements:

• Arrange time when you will not be disturbed;

• Sit in a comfortable position and relax;

• Close your eyes, unless you prefer an open-eye meditation;

• Breathe intentionally for a few breaths;

• Choose a focal point, such as music, a chant, a pleasing image, a guiding voice;

• Stay with the focal point; if your mind wanders, gently return to the focal point;

• Bring the meditation to a close and return to your activities, refreshed.

If this is your first time meditating, you may feel that "nothing is happening" during the first few times you sit to meditate. That is a common sensation. At the end of your chosen meditation time, simply get up and continue with your day. The benefits are cumulative, which is why I advocate a regular practice.

If you want to meditate, yet are not meditating or are not meditating as frequently as you want, please be gentle with yourself. While it is true that only you can sit down and do it, you can also find ways to make it more appealing. In order to have a meditation practice, you must practice meditation. Above all else, follow your heart and trust your own inner guidance.

What about you? Do you want to be part of this quiet revolution? Are you already part of the revolution but wanting to meditate more regularly? If so, meditate one session at a time until it becomes a natural part of your life.

Facialbuilding ... The Last Word In Facial Exercise

How did you get started in Facialbuilding?

I began teaching Facial Exercise in 1976. At that time, Isometrics were the only form of facial training known to the public. A year later, still teaching Facial Isometrics, I became interested in weightlifting and soon after stepped into competitive bodybuilding. This move called for a marked reduction in body fat. Consequently, this loss of fat had an aging effect on my face. As a Facial Trainer this was not an acceptable trade-off!

I had no intention of giving up bodybuilding, but determined to remedy my dilemma. On a hunch that resistance training could add fullness to my face in the same way it did to my body, I decided to convert each Isometric exercise into an exercise using resistance. This was the beginning of Facialbuilding.

Knowing what it took to increase muscle density (fullness), I knew resistance training would be far more aggressive than the facial training I had been doing. This took a lot of nerve on my part since I, too, had been duped into thinking any handling of the face could prove detrimental. When I described my new training technique, which I dubbed ‘Facialbuilding' as “an extension of bodybuilding”, fellow trainers thought I was out of my mind. Frankly, I wasn’t so sure they weren’t on to something.

Much to my relief, my hunch paid off. A very short time proved facial muscles to be every bit as responsive to resistance training as the rest of the body. My face was still thin, but with the extra lift and firmness, I went from gaunt to a healthier more athletic look. That’s when it became perfectly clear why mainstream facial exercise never got off the ground ... we simply weren’t taking it far enough.

Who would benefit?

Everyone. A better question would be: who would get the most out of it? The answer to this question is the person who starts early, before the signs of aging set in. For them, time stands still. However, the majority of testimonials reporting excellent results are not from the early birds; they are from the late starters -- men and women ages 45, 50 and up.

Would you say FlexEffect Facialbuilding is better than a surgical face-lift?

FlexEffect is not a magic bullet. There are those with such sun damage and advanced facial aging that they may never be able to achieve all they hope for in training. But that doesn’t mean they can’t get all the benefits that only training can offer.

Cosmetic surgery can alleviate lines and sag but it cannot replace the fullness of the face. In most cases surgery flattens the face, which is why so many women have cheek implants inserted at the time of their surgery. The exact opposite is true of Facialbuilding. FlexEffect does a beautiful job replacing fullness, considered to be the most youthful feature of the face.

Those who start Facialbuilding while their face is still firm, could expect to erase the need for surgery indefinitely. Many late starters with an excessive amount of sun damage and sag may still find they get enough return from their training to forego a major facelift.

Before anyone ops for surgery they should first invest time in training to get as much out of it as they can. Then, if the results of their training stops short of their goal, by that time, electing to have surgery, they’ll find they won’t have the need for as much surgery and their skin will be in far better shape for healing. Once all is healed, they should jump back into their training and not let it happen again.

What type of changes should one expect to see?

Initially, the change most Flexers comment on about three weeks into their training is how their face feels different to the touch. They notice increased tautness and thickness in the cheek and mouth area. Lips become more defined, and there is an increase in facial oil production. This is a real bonus since it is natural oil that holds moisture in the skin – bye-bye dry skin! Three months will bring a visual lift in the cheeks, even more firmness, and smooth skin where there used to be fine lines. In six months, friends will be asking you to teach them the exercises.

How does Flexeffect affect the skin?

Without doubt, Facialbuilding is a tremendous benefit to the skin. With this constant flushing of oxygen and nutrients, the skin cells become healthier. Before a cell dies, it clones itself. This newly cloned cell will become healthier before cloning itself -- and so on, and so on. This means better skin tone and better texture. The bottom line: you cannot beef-up muscle without beefing-up its connective (surrounding) tissue.

Like any form of fitness training, Facialbuilding takes time and discipline. Muscle builds fast but it’s going to take your skin considerably longer (re-cycling of cells) to show the benefit of your training. Give yourself a year. I know a year sounds like a long time, but you’ll be watching your face improve from month to month. Can’t get more exciting than that!

In 1997, Eureka Physical Therapy in Eureka, California and Deborah Crowley founder of FlexEffect conducted an independent study on the effects of 'FlexEffect' Facialbuilding.

Under the direction of Deborah Crowley, a panel of healthy females (average age 45) trained daily for a period of two weeks in Facialbuilding (FlexEffect) the results showed an average 35% increase in facial muscle strength. 100% of the panelists reported an increase in facial firmness.

Deborah Crowley is an IFA Certified Personal Trainer, former competitive bodybuilder, and Official Guide to Facial Exercise. She is the originator of Facialbuilding Est. in 1979 Eureka, California. Deborah is currently teaching FlexEffect Facialbuilding at Mad River Community Hospital in Arcata, CA. You can visit Deb online at … http://www.flexeffect.com.

Most Dangerous Relationship Mistakes of Career and Take-Charge Women

An in-patient ward for depression and suicide attempts was the last place 36 year-old “Amber,” a successful financial analyst, expected to wake up. After what she described as a meltdown, Amber thought she took enough pills to end forever the pain from a disappointing marriage and desperate affair. Months of therapy and medication made Amber realize that she may have been smart about her career but not about love.

Amber is not alone. Depression, eating disorders, suicide attempts and other alarming relationship problems such as domestic violence often occur together. Any one of these areas is a warning sign. However, while author and psychologist, Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, was studying over 360 women for her next book project, The No-Nonsense Woman’s Guide to Love, she discovered that some highly capable women, especially ages 22-47, had problems that put them in greater danger of losing their lives or making serious relationship mistakes. Amber’s story is a wake up call for today’s take-charge women.

Mistake #1: Pasts: From Fake Smart Cookies to Real Crumbles

Like many of the strong, no-nonsense women in the research, Amber came from a broken and unloving family. She blamed herself for her parents’ divorce and thought if she had been more important, then her critical father would not have left. Her last memory was his scowling at her for not getting all A’s. Critical parents and divorced parents can make even the smartest cookie fear relationship break ups and feel flawed.

The best relationship advice for women with this background is to recognize that their families’ words and behaviors are expressions of how the parents felt about themselves—not about the children. Practice repeating in the mirror often: “It’s not about me. It’s not true of me. It’s about them and their problems.”

Mistake #2: Control Freaks: From Talk-the-talk--but Not Walk-the-walk

Because Amber secretly felt damaged, she experienced small mistakes as mortal blows. Many capable women strive for perfection and believe control prevents unhappy endings. They often avoid asking for help because it activates fears of being controlled or found wrong and weak. In their careers, they’re proud to be seen as take-charge women. Co-workers detested Amber’s micro-managing and described her as a person who could dish it out but not take it. She was a secret fraud who could talk the talk but not walk the walk.

To lessen the need for self-protection, build comfort with shortcomings by engaging in activities where mistakes are inevitable. When Amber took line-dancing lessons, she discovered that looking foolish was not so bad. Her confidence allowed her to drop her guard in other areas. Now she could walk the walk.

Mistake #3: Dangerous Love Flips: From Meek Men to Mean Men

Women with emotional scars from unloving families often flip back and forth between men they control or men they over-please. Amber chose an ineffective husband in the hope that he would be too weak to find fault with her or leave. When the disappointment in a pliable man becomes too high, like Amber, many strong women choose a man of charm, status and power. Too late these take-charge women discover that the man’s sense of authority turned to authoritarianism and domestic violence. Amber’s self-worth was so low that she allowed herself to over-value the man and buckle to his demands and abuse.

Smart relationship advice is to recognize the hidden danger of dating flips. If a woman has chosen a good but weak man, she should make a list of the positive characteristics that made her choose the man in the first place. Understanding her partner’s family background allows her to develop non-critical ways of helping him overcome his fears. The goal is to create a warm emotional environment of mutual aid so they can fall in love again.

Mistake #4: Seeking affairs: From Grass is Greener on the Other Side to Rotten

Like some of the capable women, Amber fantasized that having an affair would prevent her from feeling depressed. At first, it was exciting, but that high soon gave way to torment. Amber could not risk divorce, and she held on to her husband as back up in case the affair did not work out. Smart love does not include affairs. Women should regard extra-relationship behaviors and thoughts as warning signs and seek professional help.

Mistake #5: Starving for Love: From Imperfect Self to Perfect Body

The more unhappy Amber became, the more she relied on misguided ways of making herself perfect for her lover. Since she over-valued her new man, Amber believed she had to bolster her under-value of herself by becoming too thin. Like other women in the study, Amber ate a “prison diet” of lettuce, celery, water, coffee and a small amount of grain.

The best solutions are to regard calorie restriction and excessive exercising as a major warning sign and to ignore friend’s compliments and photos of supermodels. Women need to accept their body’s natural limitations and aim instead for their unique healthy weight and body mass index.

Mistake #6: Emotional Meltdowns and Suicide: From Top of the World to Bottom of the Pit

The first time Amber’s new man broke up with her, she had a meltdown. She couldn’t sleep or think and almost got fired when she dropped the ball on an important career project. She was shocked at her reaction--she thought she was stronger. The second time her lover broke up with her, he said it was for good. He found someone else. And that’s when Amber tried to kill herself. Smart women can end up at the end of their emotional rope, too, because they underestimate their need for love from a man.

If Amber had paid attention to her dissatisfaction, depression and thoughts of suicide, she might have sought counseling. But many of today’s women are too afraid to face their sense of shame shock at being so out of control in their lives. True strong-minded women can avoid this mistake if they respect these crucial warning signs and seek professional relationship advice. A Smart Cookie is an Emotionally Brave Cookie.

Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, is a noted psychologist and social worker, nationally recognized for her work with women’s careers, relationships, and family. If you would like to participate in the research for this book project or would like her to speak at your event, contact her through her website at www.lovevictory.com or call 941.363.0505.

How to be inspired today?

How does one feel more inspired everyday? Inspiration is the stimulation of the mind or emotions to a high level of feeling or activity. Inspiration comes from the Latin, inspirare which means “To breathe, to blow into …the Spirit is within.” If you want to feel and be inspired today, here are five suggestions:

1. Movies and music have always been a great source of inspiration. I recall that a key contributor reporting to me told me he was going after his dream to be a radio sports announcer after seeing the movie, “Field of Dreams.” The movie, “Forrest Gump” continues to be a source of inspiration for me. I’d recommend obtaining “The 100 Greatest Movies of All-time” by the American Film Institute. Be aware as well that some movies and music can un-inspire you, so watch a classic movie tonight.

2. Dare to dream…BIG. Only 5% of Americans have goals in writing according to numerous studies, so it’s no surprise that most people don’t feel or act inspired. When you have a worthwhile, meaningful goal, objective or outcome written down that you’re striving towards, your inspiration will increase. If you have goals, remember what Michaelangelo said: “The greater danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we hit it." Stretch yourself today, because we use 10% or less of our mental potential.

3. Contrast, and “count your blessing, not your troubles.” In 25 years of working in personal development, I’ve noticed that when I or my clients have the opportunity to contrast their problems with other people’s problems, they quickly come to realize that “I have it better than I thought.” We take so much for granted, and tend to focus on the negative vs. the positive, which is a human tendency that must constantly be battled. One way to accomplish this is before you go to sleep tonight, count all of your blessings, and count none of your “troubles.” It’s also a great way to start off the morning, too. What are you thankful for? An attitude of gratitude lifts the spirit to more consistent inspiration.

4. One of the primary and best ways to be more consistently inspired is to attend church. A report from the Dallas Morning News: those who regularly attend worship service experience reduced amounts of suicide, drug and alcohol abuse, crime, and out-of-wedlock births compared to those who do not attend regular worship service. In addition, they are happier, healthier, have a lower rate of depression, higher level of self-esteem, less divorce, and yes - better sex. They also earn an average of $1100 a month more than those who do not regularly attend worship service. If you already attend church, tithe or give-away five percent of your income – I promise, you’ll be inspired.

5. The greatest source of hope for the future (beyond God and church) and inspiration today is growing personally in our skills, knowledge and attitudes: personal development. If one feels as if they are stagnated or slipping backwards, that person rarely feels inspired, stimulated to high levels of achievement. On the other hand, when you and others notice that you’re growing as a person, changing some of your destructive habits, changing your thinking and attitudes, you feel more of a sense of hope – and that hope is inspirational, knowing that a better day is soon coming because you are becoming a better you! It’s almost guaranteed; remember, patience is a form of action.

Follow these five suggestions for how to become more consistently inspired – feeling, thinking and acting like you have unusual energy, drive, perseverance and calm expectancy of near-term results – and you’ll know for certain that you are headed in the right direction in life. Trust that still, small voice that says, “This might work, and I’ll try it.” Mark Twain said it best:, “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Charlie Breeding is President of Performance Improvement Institute (www.thepepcoach.com and http://www.breedingsuccess.com), an Internet Information provider, publisher and professional speaker, coach, consultant, trainer, and Inspiration leader. Mr. Breeding is a graduate of the US Military Academy, West Point and has worked in the Performance Improvement area for over 25 years – fifteen years with Dale Carnegie Training, and with FranklinCovey. His second book, Breeding Trust: Why We Struggle with Trust Today & Inspiration for a Lifetime will be published in 2008. Reach him at (336) 643.1115 or his blog at www.breedingsuccessblog.com.

Herbal Remedies vs. Conventional Medicine

There are two main philosophies around the treatment of illnesses. The conventional approach looks at disease as the actual problem, whereas the holistic approach, which utilizes herbal remedies, sees the disease as an outcome of systems dysfunctioning within the body. In conventional medicine, the illness is treated as a series of symptoms seen as a result of the illness that unfortunately occurred within the body. Medicinal treatments function to soothe these symptoms and enable management of the disease. Unfortunately, these “medicines” are wrought with negative and uncomfortable side effects. This is because treatment usually involves poisoning and killing the bad bacteria, cells, mold, or whatever that has been identified as bringing on the illness. However, this also means that the good cells, bacteria, and so on, which are the very components most needed during illness, are also killed, casualties of the treatment. The result is that such treatments further weaken the systems within the body, leaving it even more susceptible to illness, which often create a vicious downward spiral of illness followed by treatment, followed by more illness, and possibly death.

Another philosophy, the holistic approach, uses natural healing methods, including herbal remedies, which enable the body to heal itself. The practitioner doctor looks at the body as a whole, viewing all systems working harmoniously together to run the amazing machine that is our body; this is where the word “holistic” comes from. When there is a breakdown within one or more systems, the doctor looks for the cause of the breakdown, such as the body being exposed to too much continued stress and over-tiredness, resulting in a shortage of certain vitamins or minerals, all which contribute to the system lacking the materials needed to run efficiently. Herbs can be chosen to add needed vitamins and minerals to gradually and gently balance deficiencies within the body. The above is just a simple example of how herbal remedies can be incorporated into care. In many cases, herbal remedies can be used to augment specific areas within the body. An example would be the body suffering from an invasive virus causing cold or flu. Eating large amounts of raw garlic will quickly stop the virus in its tracks. This is because garlic, called the number one antibiotic for herbs, contains allicin, a strong antibiotic agent, and sulphur compounds, which strengthen the immune system as well as fight infection. An antibiotic remedy, called the “Enhanced Garlic Formula”, calls for 1 part each of garlic powder and powdered calcium ascorbate (form of vitamin C) mixed with ¼ part Cayenne powder (L. Thomas, 1992).

One of the benefits around the use of herbal remedies is there are almost never any negative side effects, when used correctly. Carefully chosen herbs work gently on the body, and are not intrusive. Also, because it is natural, herbs tend to complement the body’s systems, instead of working or fighting against them. Herbal remedies can be used as both a preventative measure as well as a way to help balance the body when it has broken down and is suffering from chronic illness, such as cancer, stroke, heart attack, or high blood pressure. For example, hawthorn- dried berries, leaves, or flowers- is the primary herb for toning and strengthening the heart and cardiovascular system. It is a very safe internal herb for the heart, and can be used for congestive heart failure and angina, among other conditions. Hawthorn increases blood flow to the heart muscle itself, counteracting death resulting from heart attack, which is from lack of blood flow to the heart. The recommended dosage of hawthorn for those with heart disease is 300-450 milligrams every day. As a preventative measure, 100-150 mg will do. Of course any treatment should be overseen by a qualified doctor well versed with the actions and interactions of herbs, and may be used jointly with conventional medicine. However, many have found herbal treatment to work well enough on its own, when care is being properly directed from a qualified person.

Many conventional drugs used today to treat various illnesses originated from the natural healing properties found in herbs. A good example is aspirin, which was originally derived from willow bark for its salicylic content. Through the years, scientists found ways to isolate beneficial compounds found in medicinal plants and create them synthetically in a lab. This was done for multiple reasons. It was more cost effective, as plants vary in potency depending on where they are grown, as well as the growing conditions, which, when these compounds are simplified and copied, can be controlled. With synthetic production, risk of contamination from wrongly identified plant specimen or even contamination from pesticides and other conditions can also be eliminated. And most important, it was economically advantageous to isolate – and patent – individual components of the medicinal herbs seen as beneficial to combating illness.

However, with the introduction and predominant use of synthetic drugs on the market, other unforeseen issues cropped up. The main drawback to these synthetics is its very unpleasant and frequently dangerous side effects that range from mild allergic reactions to poisoning the body’s systems to the point of shutdown. The culprit is usually the result of synthetic medicines using potent compounds that were initially isolated from plants, but were not copied over in entirety. (Remember the patent approach). A simplified example is vitamin C, which has only recently been found to work incompletely within the body because, among other things, was missing flavonoids. Scientists still are far from having a complete understanding of the human body, and as a result, synthetic medicine can have unforeseen and long-lasting destruction on the body. The best that medicine can be expected to do at this time is manage the effects of disease and illness, with the hope that enough of the negative cells and bacteria are eliminated before the whole body system collapses.

The holistic approach centers on prevention and identifying at-risk areas of health before it becomes a problem. Conventional medicine has become little more than disease management. Conventional medicine may be beneficial for acute injuries, such as a car accident, broken bones, heat stroke, frostbite, and the like; however chronic conditions such as the flu, diabetes, heart disease, and cancer can all benefit from a more holistic approach that incorporates herbal remedies into a regimen of care.

Aurelia & Kennon Ward are founders of a new company called Herbal Vista LLC, which focuses on selling healthy sustainable products, and Selfgrowth.com Official Guides to Herbal Remedies. They are currently developing their own line of all natural herbal skincare that soothes both the skin and achy muscles. The products are planned to be ready for distribution later this year. Kennon is both a Reiki Master and herbalist, specializing in preparing specialty healing teas (coming soon on www.herbalvista.com). Aurelia was trained in research and development, and studies aromatherapy. For more information, visit www.herbalvista.com, or e-mail Aurelia at: award@herbalvista.com.

Meditation For Spiritual Healing

You were born with the ability to transform the landscape of your life.

You have the ability to benefit from the challenges you are living and to advance even further toward the fulfillment of your desires because of them. With practice, your problems can become no more than springboards into greater satisfaction in your life.

Spiritual Healing creates results that would seem impossible through other methods. The list of possibilities is longer than I can fit in this small article. Here is a sample:

· Instantaneous relief from chronic pain.
· Financial recovery after difficult times.
· Finding a soul mate after years of loneliness.
· Harmony and respect in a previously conflicted relationship.
· Feeling at home in one’s world after a sense of alienation.
· Feeling appreciated and valued after feeling judged and ignored.

These and more benefits can be yours and you don’t need to buy anything nor seek the help of any other human being.

Methods

There are many methods for accessing spiritual healing. Within all spiritual traditions you will find esoteric teachings that can unlock this mystery for you. The meditation I describe below is simply one of many possibilities along the journey of self-healing. I offer it to you here in the spirit of love and service.

This is a very simple technique for the purpose of our brief encounter as you read this article. Simplicity is often the most potent ingredient in a healing formula, so please don’t dismiss the power of this technique because of its brevity or because I offer it here for free. I expect you to get results when you follow these instructions and you can share this method with your loved ones who are suffering in any way.

Love-Light Meditation

1 – Sit Upright.

To those who currently may feel weak, ill, or disabled and must lie down, that is okay. Otherwise, please sit upright for best results.

2 – Invite the Divine Presence

Invite the Divine Presence (in whatever way is natural to you and your culture, religion, or tradition) to assist you in your healing.

3 – Love-Light

Imagine a beam of light running through your spine. Let that light be made of love. See that light extending infinitely above and below you. Allow it to align you with the center of the earth and the expanse of heaven. Feel yourself nurtured and taken care of by this love-light.

4 – Focused Light

Imagine a campfire or a sun in your belly made of this same light.

5 – Expanded Light

Let the light expand to include your whole body.

6 – Love-Light Replaces the Problem

Since a problem cannot live in the space of this love-light, imagine anything that you perceive as a problem pouring out of you. In your imagination you may see it come out of you through your breath or your pores or in any other imagined way. It may look like smoke being pressed out by the light. You may see it as a stream of viruses pouring out of an infected area leaving that area clean and pure. It may take the appearance of snakes or worms squirming away from the light. Do not get interested in the form it takes. Let it go completely and keep the love-light steady and glowing throughout the length of your body with a concentration at your navel. Feel the soothing and comforting nature of this light. Feel your entire body-mind-energy field refreshed, cleaned, beautified, and purified.

7 – Appreciation

When your session feels complete (a few minutes should be sufficient) give thanks to the Divine Source of this goodness and visualize a joyful outcome on this subject. Trust that your healing is underway.

Now, in your everyday life, begin to shift more of your attention to your joyful harmonious expressiveness (jhe) than to your problem. Speak less of your problem and more of the good that is coming your way. Feel it. Know it. Trust it.

Watch for solutions as they come to you through the attractive force of your love-light. They may come as inspired thoughts or as offerings from others. Acknowledge and appreciate any manifestations – even if they are small at first—of the fulfillment of your desire. Do not be bothered by how long it takes. With this simple daily practice you begin your spiritual healing and you advance your spiritual journey.

Dr. Rebbie Straubing practices a method of spiritual healing that helps people achieve profound physical, emotional, financial, and interpersonal healing. This method consists of remote (from a distance) inner alignment sessions. People living in North and South America, Hawaii, Europe, Asia, Australia, New Zealand, and Africa have reported noticeable results from the YOFA® system of spiritual healing. Rebbie is the founder of YOFA® at http://YOFA.net and the author of Rooted in the Infinite. She has been a student of the Abraham-Hicks teachings since 1993 and has been leading spiritual healing workshops since 1986. For more information about YOFA® spiritual healing sessions, please visit http://AdvancedSpiritualHealing.com

Executive Coaching Guru Tells You What It Takes to Succeed

As an executive coach, I’m often asked for my best thoughts on what it takes to become a career and life success. I always tell my executive coaching clients to think systematically, to break success down into some manageable components.

Here is a bullet point summary of what I tell my executive coaching clients on how to become a career and life success. Put these points to use and you will succeed, just like my executive coaching clients.

My experience as an executive coach as taught me the simple, time proven common sense techniques are best for achieving the success you want and deserve. Take a look at these common sense ideas that I share with all of my executive coaching clients.

Do it yourself. Realize that no one is going to do it for you – not even your executive coach. You have to take personal responsibility for your success. Adopt the motto, “If it’s to be, it’s up to me.”

Become an optimist. Believe that things will turn out well. When they don’t, don’t sulk. Learn what you can from a problem or failure and use it to your advantage the next time.

Don’t procrastinate. Procrastination is usually tied to fear. In most cases, when you procrastinate, you are doing so because you are afraid of something. Identify those fears and then do something to overcome them. Action cures fear. Act – even when, especially when, you are afraid.

Surround yourself with positive people. Jettison the negative people in your life. If you can’t rid yourself of them completely, do your best to minimize the time you spend with them. Negative people are an energy black hole. They will suck you dry if you let them.

Find a mentor or executive coach, someone who will help you meet your career and life goals. Mentors and executive coaches, by nature, are positive people. They can help you find the lessons in problems and failures and use these lessons to move forward.

Be a brand. Create and nurture your personal brand. Make sure you stand for and are known for something. Make sure that everything you do is on brand.

Look good. Be well groomed and appropriate for every situation. Always dress one level up from what is expected. In this way, you will stand out from the crowd. A good executive coach can help you with this.

Have manners. Learn and use the basic rules of etiquette. This will distinguish you as a person who is in the know. Social faux pas might not ruin your career, but they certainly won’t help it.

Make people comfortable. The best etiquette advice I’ve ever received is simple. In any social situation, do what makes the other person or people comfortable.

Become an expert. Master your technical discipline, and then keep learning. Become a lifelong learner. The half-life of knowledge these days is rapidly diminishing. Staying in the same place is the same as going backwards.

Aim high. Set and achieve high goals year after year after year. Use the S.M.A.R.T. technique of goal setting.

Get organized. Learn to use time to your advantage. Organize not only your time but your life and workspace. Sweat the small stuff. Success is in execution. Execution is in the details.

Become an excellent conversationalist. You can do this by listening more than you speak. Pay attention to what other people are saying and respond appropriately.

Write clearly and simply. Short words and sentences are best. Never use two or three words to say what you can say in one. Write in the first person. Use the active voice.

Develop your presentation skills. Adopt this simple formula for your talks: Tell them what you will tell them. Tell them. Tell them what you told them. Write your closing first, your opening next. Then fill in the content.

Get to know yourself, as well or better than your executive coach knows you. Use this knowledge to better understand others.

Get to know others. Use your knowledge of others to build strong, mutually beneficial relationships with them.

Give. Build relationships by giving with no expectation of return. When you help others because you want to, not because you believe they will do something for you, you’ll find that you will be repaid many times over. Giving of yourself, especially your time, is a great way to build strong, lasting relationships.

Use conflict as a means to improve relationships. When you find yourself in a conflict situation, focus on where you agree, not disagree, with the other person. This will help you develop creative solutions to your differences, and improve the relationship.

There is one last point I’d like to make here, and I make it over and over again with my executive coaching clients. You need to use this information. Hopefully, you have some more knowledge about becoming a success in your life and career after reading these quick points. But, as the U.S. Steel pencils used to say, “Knowing is not enough.” You have to use this knowledge if you’re going to become a career and life success.

Remember, success is a journey, not a destination. Good luck in your journey. You have my best wishes for your continued success.

Bud Bilanich
The Common Sense Guy and Executive Coach

Bud Bilanich, The Common Sense Guy, is an executive coach, motivational speaker, author and blogger. He is the Official Executive Coaching Guide at SelfGrowth.com. He helps his executive coaching clients succeed by applying their common sense. Dr. Bilanich is Harvard educated but has a no nonsense approach to his work to goes back to his childhood in the steel country of Western Pennsylvania. Bud is a cancer survivor and lives in Denver Colorado with his wife Cathy. He is a retired rugby player and an avid cyclist. He likes movies, live theatre and crime fiction. http://www.budbilanich.com/.

Secret 15˚ Feng Shui Personal Directions That Influence Your Life

Gravity affects everyone, even without our awareness. In fact, you’re influenced by other laws of nature from the moment of birth, including the inherent Feng Shui energies present in all buildings and your unique directional relationship to the magnetic forces of Earth. Even without your awareness Feng Shui influences are affecting your finances, health and relationships.

The 5 levels of influence in Classical Feng Shui are…

• General ENVIRONMENTAL Problems… like Electrical Transformers, Clutter & Broken things

• Problems with the Movement of Qi (chi)… including Blocked Qi, a Direct Hit or Loss of Qi

• Inherent Energies… affecting People (Health & Relationship) & Money (Finances & Career)

• Cyclical Energies… Annual & 20 year Construction Cycle LOCKS on People and/or Money

• Personal Directions… your lifetime 45° & 15° Directions according to your gender & date of birth

Beyond the first two visible levels of influence is your building’s unseen energy blueprint, which includes supportive and sabotaging energies. The energy blueprint is influenced by the Visiting Annual Energy, which is why one year can be better or worse in the same building. To neutralize the negative and enhance the positive energies Classical Feng Shui uses the five elements (water fountains, live plants, fire colored, earthen or metal objects) as beautiful accessories that blend with your décor.

Many consultants will tell your Kua or Trigram general 45° gender and birthday derived directions, however barely 5% of consultants are capable of doing the calculation involved to determine your unique set of 15° Feng Shui Personal Directions. As an internationally respected instructor for the American Feng Shui Institute and founder of The Feng Shui Advantage consulting firm… I’ve worked with these secret 15˚ directions for over a decade, teaching thousands of clients how to manage all of their Personal Directions by using their one-of-a-kind Feng Shui Advantage Personal Directions Birth-Chart.

The poetic Chinese names of your 15° Personal Direction confuse most people, so I refer to them as your 'Lifetime Keys', because these magnetic directions are the key to how your life is influenced from the moment you’re born. You’re automatically influenced by the following ‘Lifetime Keys’ directions when your home/office is sitting toward one of your exact directions and/or an opening (door/window) is located in one of these precise directions from the magnetic center of your home/office. A few of these directions have other conditions that trigger them, such as:

• TALENT – Your CREATIVE (right) brain is also supported by sitting/standing with your back pointing toward your specific 15° TALENT direction. One of my clients used his Feng Shui Advantage Personal Directions Birth-Chart to end his writer’s block, by sitting with his back toward his 15˚ Talent direction. He said “Before I knew it I’d written three chapters.”

• INTELLECT – Your ANALYTICAL (left) brain is supported by when your back is pointing toward your opposite 15° INTELLECT direction. A client’s 4 children with Attention Deficient Disorder grades all improved by sitting with their backs toward their individual 15˚ Intellect directions. Their mother is saving their Feng Shui Advantage Personal Directions Birth-Chart, so they can locate all of their 15˚ directions anywhere, from their dorm room to their retirement home.

• PROSPEROUS – Brings you PROSPERITY. When a client’s home isn’t good for making money, but sits toward or has a door/window in their Prosperous 15˚ direction… they do better financially than anyone else living in there. However, after they implement the necessary elemental remedies in and around their home… everyone’s financial situation improves.

• CONSUMING – DRAINS your money away through extravagant spending or uncontrollable expenses, even if the building's energy blueprint is good for making money. Having her front door in her ‘Consuming’ direction brought one client to the verge of bankruptcy. By directing everyone to use their side door and installing all the required elemental remedies, soon they’d saved enough to purchase several investment properties.

• Valued FRIENDS – Brings FRIENDS into your life that SUPPORT of your efforts (including business referrals). Luckily, after suffering a sever brain injury, a teacher moved into an apartment sitting in her Valued Friends direction, which assured her assistance when needed. However, once she installed the necessary Feng Shui remedies… both her health and income improved. She even won a large settlement from the accident that caused her brain injury.

• LONELY PILLOW – Keeps you single when your headboard is toward your 15° ‘Lonely Pillow’ direction. Doors/windows within your ‘Lonely Pillow’ direction from the magnetic center of your whole house or bedroom/suite will also keep you sleeping alone. Plus, a mirror or your bed in this 15° portion of your house or bedroom will trigger ‘Lonely Pillow Syndrome,’ which even keeps celebrities like Oprah’s best friend, Gayle King single. Before hiring me… a beautiful lady had gone 7 years without a single date and after moving her bed away from her ‘Lonely Pillow’ direction she had 3 dates in the very first week with the help from Romance Vase.

• ROMANCE Vase – Brings more ROMANTIC partners to choose from. If SINGLE, you’ll needed to place your specific colored vase with its coordinating colored fresh-cut flowers in fresh water within the precise 15° ROMANCE portion of your bedroom. This increases the QUANTITY of partners to choose from. However, you must still choose carefully because nothing can guarantee the quality of a potential partner. I’m always delighted when a client calls to ask “Now that I’m engaged, do I still buy flowers for my Romance Vase?” To which I reply… “No, you’ve made your choice and congratulations.”

• 
  

By now, you know what to expect from a comprehensive Classical Feng Shui analysis of your home/office. When you interview potential consultants… ask if their consultation covers all 5 levels, including a written report with all your 15˚ Personal Directions (including your Robbery and Injury directions not mentioned above) and if they offer Annual Updates. As with any professional, you’ll want to verify their credentials and contact their references before trusting any consultant with the fate of your family or business.

© 2008 P.K. Odle. All rights reserved.

NOTE: You’re welcome to “reprint” this article online as long as it remains complete

P.K. Odle… Classical Feng Shui consultant, author, speaker, internationally respected instructor for the renowned American Feng Shui Institute and Official Guide to Feng Shui on Self-Growth.com has created www.PersonalDirectionsSelfMasteryToolbox.net The Feng Shui Advantage’s ‘Lifetime Keys Personal Directions Self-Mastery Toolbox’ to teach you how to manage all of your birthday derived Feng Shui Personal Directions. Her award winning email newsletter, The Feng Shui Advantage Monthly, offers free tips and articles about using the ancient Chinese science of Classical Feng Shui to improve your Health, Relationships and Finances… visit www.FengShuiAdvantageMonthly.net for your free subscription, today. The next issue… could change your life!

Alternative Medicine – Healing Comes from Within

Many people don't feel good, but don't really know why. They complain of “unexplained” symptoms such as chronic fatigue, over-weight, depression, memory loss, fibromyalgia, food cravings, headaches, muscle and joint pain, arthritis, intractable back pain, heartburn, bloating, constipation, diarrhea, mood swings, rashes, itching, allergies, attention deficit, dyslexia, hearing and vision loss, balance problems, high blood pressure, insomnia, ...the list goes on. Standard medical tests show little or nothing. Many of my patients have reported over the years that their MD's either ignore these symptoms or give vague explanations such as:

• It is because of your age

• You just have to live with it

• It's all in your head

• It is stress

• It is genetic

• It is...

What this really means: nobody knows how to determine the cause for all these symptoms.

Allopathic Medicine

Over the past decades traditional western allopathic medicine has come up with extraordinary number of pharmaceutical drugs in order to fight an extraordinary number of diseases. It seemed in the past, and it still appears that way today, that if we only could come up with the right chemical compound we could eventually conquer and eliminate any disease under the sun. This quest for the "Silver Bullet" continues.

Chronic Illness

Somehow, we seem to have missed the mark. With the amount of medication consumed in the USA one would assume that we are the healthiest people on the planet. However, we have more chronic diseases than ever. Even though our life span has been increased, our quality of life has not. Healthy aging eludes many of us. Diabetes, arthritis, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, cancer, autoimmune disorders, allergies, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, depression abound.

Alternative Medicine: No Drugs – No surgery

• Alternative Medicine - a different paradigm

• The power to heal lies within YOU.

• YOUR Alternative Medicine practitioner – YOUR coach, your teacher

• YOU must take full responsibility

• YOU must be willing to CHANGE

Alternative Medicine - There are No Magic Pills

Who we are is the sum total of our genetic strengths and weaknesses, our upbringing, our education, our environment, the quality of our food, the quality of our water, the quality of the air we breathe, the quality of our thoughts, our emotions, our relationships to one another, our capacity to give and receive love and affection, the amount of bad impressions we take in from horrible TV shows, the amount of ever increasing violence we are exposed to in the movies and/or in real life, the functioning of our brain and nervous system, our organs, our organ systems...

Alternative Medicine - The only Question is WHY

The only relevant question to ask: WHY?
Why do you have these symptoms?
Why is your body malfunctioning?

These are of course the most difficult questions to answer.

Alternative Medicine is concerned with the functioning of the entire human being in the context of his or her life. Genetics and life style are part of the equation. Illness and disease are not seen as independent realities that are explainable by being given a name and treated as such. Illness is rather viewed as an expression of some underlying imbalance and breakdown of normal function.

Alternative Medicine - Illness and Premature Aging - a Call for Change!

Biological aging is related to a noticeable decline in normal function. Function of the brain declines with age, so does digestive function, and many other glandular and hormonal functions. Aging can be accelerated by various life style choices:

• Smokers have higher risk of age-related diseases such as cancer and heart disease.

• People who consume excessive amounts of alcohol have increased risk of liver and cardiovascular problems.

• Poor quality/junk food diets that are excessive in carbohydrates (calories) and low in protein and other essential nutrients lead to obesity, diabetes, digestive stress, heart problems and frequent illness in general.

• “Recreational” drug users/addicts - you see this in their complexion, their posture, the evidence of their mental decline.

• Use and over-use of pharmaceutical drugs – ALL have side effects.

• Lack of physical activity and our sedentary life styles decreases brain function.

• Inadequate digestive function leads to malnutrition, which in turn affects all aspects of our lives.

• Antibiotic use destroys the normal bacterial flora in your intestines.

• Antibiotic use causes Candida overgrowth and immune system suppression, with devastating consequences for your health.

• Chronic stress accelerates aging

• Shallow breathing and/or polluted air leads to oxygen deficiency.

• Oxygen starvation leads to cell malfunction, especially in your heart and brain.

• Mercury exposure from silver amalgam (mercury) fillings in your mouth is very toxic to your brain.

• Environmental toxins in air and water accelerate aging.

Alternative Medicine - Medicine of the Future

"The doctor of the future will give no medicine, but will interest his patients in the care of the human frame, in diet, and in the cause and prevention of disease." Thomas A. Edison

We can slow or even reverse our biological aging through intelligent changes in lifestyle, environment, and nutrition:

• It is estimated that making appropriate changes can positively influence more than 75 percent of our health and life expectancy after age 40!

The goal of Alternative Medicine is to optimize health through

• Chiropractic Neurology

• Removing structural stress form spine and joints

• Diet and Nutrition

• Digestive Support

• Homeopathic/Isopathic remedies

• Detoxification

• Balancing body ph

• Improved oxygenation and deeper breathing

• Increased physical activity

• Brain exercises

• Color and light therapies

• And more

Health is not seen as merely the absence of disease, but rather as an expression of vitality and well-being. An ever increasing number of healthcare professionals are becoming aware of the shortcomings and failures of allopathic medicine.

Alternative Medicine is slowly coming of age and is the true Medicine of the Future.

Dr. Z - Peter M. Zeischegg grew up in Germany. He received his MS degree in Civil Engineering from Technical University Berlin. In 1986 he is awarded the Doctor of Chiropractic from Life Chiropractic College-West. Through the Occidental Research Institute he is introduced to German Alternative Medicine, Sanum/PleoSanum and Low Level Laser Therapy. In 2001 he launched Alternative Medicine website. From 2002 to 2008 - postgraduate studies in Functional Neurology with Carrick Institute. 2005 – Diplomate of American Chiropractic Neurology Board, specialty training with Carrick Institute in Autism and Dyslexia, Vestibular Rehabilitation (2006-2008). He is the Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to Alternative Medicine.

WHAT IS BODY LANGUAGE?

Body Language is the unspoken, non verbal communication that goes on in every Face-to-Face encounter with another human being. It tells you their true feelings towards you and how well your words are being received. Between 50-100% of our message is communicated through our Body Language. A simple roll of the eyes or hand gesture may be all it takes to convey 100% of what we mean, no words, no tone, in fact only 7-10% is attributable to the actual words we use.

Your ability to read and understand another person's Body Language can mean the difference between making a great impression or a very bad one! It really doesn’t matter how clever or knowledgeable you are in your field, if you can’t get your point across effectively or decode other people you work with then you’re at a disadvantage to those that do.

Here are ten practical tips on using Body Language to improve your life.

1. Eye contact

Eye contact is one of the most important aspects of dealing with others, especially people we have just met. Maintaining good eye contact shows respect and interest in what they have to say. In the UK we tend to keep eye contact around 60-70% of the time giving a feeling of comfort and genuine warmth in your company. Any more eye contact than this and you can be too intense, any less and you give off a signal that you are lacking interest in them or their conversation.

2. Posture

Posture is the next thing to master, get your posture right and you will automatically start feeling better, as it makes you feel good almost instantly. Next time you notice you are feeling a bit down, take a look at how you are standing or sitting. Chances are you will be slouched over with your shoulders drooping down and inward. This collapses the chest and inhibits good breathing, which in turn can help make you feel nervous or uncomfortable.

3. Head Position

When you want to feel confident and self assured keep your head level both horizontally and vertically. You can also use this straight head position when you want to be authoritative and have what you are saying to be taken seriously. Conversely, when you want to be friendly and in the listening, receptive mode, tilt your head just a little to one side or other.

4. Arms
   In general terms the more outgoing you are as a person, the more you tend to use your arms with big movements. The quieter you are the less you move your arms away from your body. So, try to strike a natural balance. When you want to come across in the best possible light, crossing the arms is a no, no in front of others. Obviously if someone says something that gets your goat, then by all means show your disapproval by crossing them!
   

5. Legs
   Legs are the furthest point away from the brain; consequently they are the hardest bits of our bodies to consciously control. They tend move around a lot more than normal when we are nervous, stressed or being deceptive. Be careful too in the way you cross your legs. If you bring your leg up to rest on the knee of the other this is known as the ‘Figure Four’ and is generally perceived as the most defensive leg cross.

6. Angle of body
   Angle of the body in relation to others gives an indication of our attitudes and feelings towards them. We angle toward people we find attractive, friendly and interesting and angle ourselves away from those we do not, it is that simple!

7. Hand Gestures
   Basic rules, Palms slightly up and outward is open and friendly. Palm down generally seen as dominant and possibly aggressive. This palm up, palm down is very important when it comes to handshaking and where appropriate I suggest you always offer a handshake upright and vertical and equal grip, which should convey equality.
   

8. Distance
   Stand too close and you will be marked as ‘Pushy’ or ‘In your face’. Stand or sit too far away and you will be ‘Keeping your distance’ or ‘Stand offish’. Neither situation is what we want, so observe in a group situation how close all the other people are to each other. Also notice if you move closer to someone and they back away, you are probably just a tiny bit too much in their personal space, their comfort zone. ‘You have overstepped the mark’ and should pull back a little.
   

9. Ears
   Ears, yes your ears you have got two ears and only one mouth, so try to use them in that order. If you listen twice as much as you talk you come across as a good communicator who knows how to strike a balanced conversation.
   

10. Mouth
    We purse our lips and sometimes twist them to the side when we are thinking. On another occasion we might use this movement to hold back an angry comment we do not wish to reveal. Nevertheless, it will probably be spotted by other people and although they may not know the comment, they will get a feeling you were not to pleased.

A renowned international platform speaker, trainer, and body language expert, Robert Phipps is in constant demand by both the media and business worlds. Robert has more than 100 television shows to his credit and has appeared on the Good Morning America and the Glenn Beck Show and his corporate clients is a Who’s Who in Business. For more information Robert Phipps go to: www.robertphipps.com or contact Robert on Office: 44+1233 335078

Attention Singles! Essential Dating Tips About Setting Boundaries

If your life is filled with more of what you don't want and not enough of what you do want, it's time to set your boundaries.

Setting and keeping your boundaries and honoring the boundaries of others are among the most challenging and confusing behaviors in relationships. Boundaries are innate and natural to everyone. Each of you has your own internal indicator of when a boundary is being violated. A boundary, when crossed by others, will create intense feelings of anger, hurt or outrage inside you.

WHAT ARE BOUNDARIES?

Boundaries define a person's sense of self (i.e., who he or she is as an individual). As a single man or woman in the dating world, setting boundaries makes others feel safe around you and allows you to feel safe in your environment; no matter where you decide to go. It is a way to exhibit self-respect, thereby increasing the respect shown to you by others.

Boundaries…

· Help other people know how to treat you

· Define your sense of self

· Delineate how much you have to give of time, money or energy

· Are dividing lines between you and everyone else that represents both physical and emotional limits others may not violate

· Separate your needs, wants, desires, thoughts and feelings from those of other people.

WHY ARE BOUNDARIES IMPORTANT WHEN YOU’RE SINGLE?

Each of us experiences our reality in four ways:

· Body - what we look like

· Thinking - how we give meaning to incoming data

· Feelings - our emotional response

· Behavior - what we do or don't do

When you’re single and meeting lots of new men and women it is essential to pay attention to your actions and reactions and your interactions with others.

Intact boundaries give you a measured protection to your body, thinking, feelings and behaviors as you evaluate and assess the words and actions of other people in your life. You filter your experiences through your cognitive mind and your feelings.

Through the use of your boundaries you determine which words and actions you will accept and which you will block when they are unacceptable.

We set boundaries to protect our body, thinking, feelings and behavior.

Again, when you’re single, dating and meeting lots of new people, being willing and able to set and maintain your boundaries is essential to your personal safety – physically, mentality and emotionally.

If you are not certain about the behaviors of others that are acceptable and unacceptable to you, then how will you be able to (1) know that you are not being treated with kindness and respect; and (2) how will you say “no” to the bad behaviors that put you at risk, physically, mentally and/or emotionally?

We all know single men and women who repeatedly give people they date the benefit of the doubt; or make excuses for bad behavior over and over again. When you set and keep your boundaries and honor the boundaries of others you will be proactive; able to act on your own behalf; say your real “yes” and your real “no” with clarity and confidence; and keep yourself safe!

· What are your boundaries?

· Where do you draw the line?

· How do you react when someone sets a boundary and asks you to honor it?

Setting and maintaining boundaries is a skill that you can learn; a skill that will feel more and more comfortable the more you put these behaviors in action; and a skill that, as a single person, you will come to depend on to help you sort all the experiences that you will have with the new people you are meeting.

Remember, only YOU can make it happen!

Copyright Dr. Jackie Black 1999-2008

We grant permission to republish with the following appropriate attribution:

By: Jackie Black, PH.D.

Relationship Educator, Author and Coach

www.DrJackieBlack.com

Jackie Black, Ph.D., dubbed the Love and Relationship Doctor by Cosmo U.K., knows that “Love is never enough!” Dr. Jackie is the author of Meeting Your Match: Cracking the code to successful relationships and the principal of the IdealMatchCoachingClub.com, serving singles who are tired of dating in the same old way; and ready to learn and practice essential relationship success skills. Dr. Jackie is an a popular Internet syndicated writer; podcaster, distributes her monthly Relationship Tips Sheet to people in over 38 countries; is a frequent contributor to magazines; and is a regular guest on radio shows across North America.